Mr Rurch and Mr Shamoneee – The Destroyers…
I have committed myself to loving my two little brother cats (lights of my life); through the deep highs and lows that inevitably come with feline ownership 😉
I feed them everyday, they never ever feed me,
They ‘wipe out’ both small and large expensive items such as cookers (I kid you not), on roughly a weekly basis,
Shamoneeeee has a problem with cling-ons, which needs no more description!!
They ignore me when-ever they want to,
More often though, they plague me when ever they want to ;)…they climb upon whatever or whoever may be near or on me, and smash their quite deceivingly heavy and massive (yet ickle) heads into my face/thighs/covering letters/laptops etc (and I love this for some absurd reason; now I love my Mum ALOT but if she was laying all over my covering letter, I’d ask her to get off it)
They have no concept of boundaries!
The other night, Mr Rurch climbed up onto the shelf and stuck his vipered little paw straight into the LOUNGE of my spandangly dolls house, and did his very worst. It was like waking up to the mini version of a burglary! I was truly shocked and a little horrified! He sat, with his little dirty look of achievement , proudly next to the mess he had created, waiting for me to open my eyes and see the destruction!” Little Shit :0
Shamoneeee particularly likes to do his immense ‘rhino style head butt thing’ on the bottom of cups with hot drinks in..he sooooo knows what he is doing as well.
Mr Rurch has got more ‘tude’ than I thought possible for any pussy cat, and I’ve known a few… he follows me round the flat screaming orders at me, and I do the food, liquid, litter standards check just to shut him up (oh the control)
They take up the whole bed and I go to sleep all bent up in strange shapes so I can spoon Shamoneee and so that Mr Rurch can rest on my shoulder/back at the same time, voluntarily!
And I spend all my days telling them how truly spangly they are! In ridiculously warm tones that no one else receives from my booming voice box
Which brings me to my philosophical conclusion
If we were a TENTH as tolerant of our partners, as we are of our pets; we’d all be in bloody mis-matched relationships that we formed age 3, til death.
If we were even HALF as tolerant of people, as we are of our pets; I imagine most of us would have a list as long as a politicians expense bill, of people we have thrown away for being too much take take take,
But this is the thing, all I wanna do is GIVE the little buggers more; whilst we maintain this highly one-sided yet divine love affair!
We all need a big old dose of cat love in our souls!
So there you have it, the question is, will a dose of ‘Cat Love’ save Human kind or not?
Only time will tell people…