National Express Thought Spillage 6

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Greg Sage's album cover for Sacrifice (For Love)

Forever

They say ‘True Love’ lasts a lifetime, and I know this not to be true, per se.

Some ‘true loves’ last for a period of our lifetime; and maybe these could still be defined loosely as a lifetime;  because as we come to the end of them, sometimes we’ve changed so much, and the love has turned into something else, something lesser. This kind of ending can close a whole lifetime’s worth of chapters. And in moving on, it kind of feels like you are indeed, starting out again. Back in Nappies and crying for a dummy, some calpol and warm miiilllllk!

So maybe there are ‘true loves’ that last a (mini/maxi/period/chapter) lifetime, maybe they do count too, or maybe not…

But some ‘true loves’, well I think they must last a whole lifetime…22 years is a long time thus far.

You will not remember the scene in the same way I do, I will never forget the intensity of her pain as she desperately tried to control both her breathing; and the volume of the sounds escaping from her, I have never heard anybody cry in this way, I’ve never seen anybody cry like this ever. Her legs were giving way underneath her, not in a dramatic way, but her knees were continuously quivering… a physical reaction to the tangible way in which she was buckling under the weight of her insides breaking. Every few seconds she would heave another

howling

soul stopping

broken

guttural

grief-stricken

retching

Sob.

She loved him, but she had no idea quite how much until the moment…

It was at this moment in my life that I realised grief at this level, is something rarely felt or witnessed,

The power of the emotion in the scene against the cobbled wall with a rickety red garage door,

16 minutes of raw heart breaking ‘hard to watch’ pain. And not a word uttered.

He could not look at her, he knew if he did, he’d be darker for it. Forever.

As her heart shattered into thousands of pieces, and her mind, body and senses all malfunctioned with grandeur under the crushing agony in her chest, she had forgotten how to breathe and stand and silence herself. But she still remembered why she was falling apart… because she would love him forever, this pain would fade but remain, forever.

Years passed….

And she still loves him. He is the lifetime that surpasses all changes and seasons, all damage and reasons. He is ‘true love’; because he holds in his heart and hands the truest love that another owns.

Love at first sight, that has lasted 22 years (and counting) cuts through all those different lifetimes, chapters and periods of starting a-new!(discussed above)

Why?? (IS this the key to the real ‘Sha-bang lifetime True Love secret’???). They simply love the intrinsic part of each other that stays steady in the soul, with all of Its immovable and fixed characteristics. He continues to evolve as a person, and she does too, and in their story they weave in many different directions; yet no matter which direction they go in, their love does not waver. It Grows.

They have given up everything for each others welfare and happiness, and they continue to do so whenever needed, period. Without question, and absent of any expectations. All done so with a beauty that cannot be explained, even with all the words in the world to choose from…

Is it because true love lies in loving JUST the essence, the soul?

Research continues as they enter their 23rd year, so I guess at best, we shall have one qualitative piece of evidence, (other than Prince Charming and Cinderella ;)) of two people who fell in love at first sight and it only went and lasted forever!

Time (and period updates) will slowly tell out this quite rare story of love; I am blessed just to have a window that looks ‘into it’.

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About Littlebeut333

'Random Spillages from a Reportedly Strange mind’… Hello all :) I’m Dawny, the littlest of the Beuts..and my brain spillage content varies from the profoundly philosophical, to utter bilge ://…Life is my inspiration. I write about friends, love, the soul, society, shrinks, people, labels, home, mothers, perfect moments, dirty politicians, music, pain, beauty, women, religion, god, mental health, the demise of humanity!!! etc…hence the ‘random’. All spilled through the eye of my ‘ever musing, slightly philosophical mind’. Although I write mostly for enjoyment, and to empty my oh so busy head; sharing my snippets appeals to me, and I also love reading the thought trails of others. I would be most chuffed if anyone comes across my page and has a browse (and if you do, thanks in advance). I guess the biggest compliment would be if, for you, my rambles are either :- slightly different from the norm, enjoyable, amusing, unenjoyable, and/or thought/emotion provoking. Whatever them thoughts or emotions might be…The good, the bad, the ugly..and everything in between!! ;)… I accidently fell in love with writing a while ago, and from that time, my inspiration has come solely from lifes varied encounters, feelings, knowledge, memories and thoughts. Welcome to my archives, to some sections of my mind :0 Dawny

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