You and Celeste…

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Српски / Srpski: figura od papir-machea, Tatja...

The Love Letter

I wish I was her, just as much as you long to be him.

I try not to read it, but the temptation is often too great when I see it next to me on the telephone table,

I knew one day it would finally be there

And that it would say everything I ever wanted to hear…

But I still find it strange that you never wrote my name on it

To be her in your eyes, I would have to be so much more than I am. As much as the fantasist in me wants your tale as my existence; even if I had enough wonderful inside me to be half the woman she was, I just coudn’t fight to fix that piece of me…

Because, oh I’m so sorry, it’s because

I know that it will never make me happy,

There is every reason why it should; it completes most, but most I am not. Why does it destroy me with such ferocity? I can only guess that it is a poison to my destiny…

 

I started at the theatre when I knew they’d based the new play on an adaptation, and I got the part. But soon the strain became obvious to the cast and just like every time, the illness intensified until I was once again, broken. They were really understanding about it all, I think having old family ties helped of course. After being discharged from hospital, they let me come back in a lesser capacity. I became the understudy to a beautiful French girl. Do you remember?

It’s been running in the west end for many years now, and for a long time, I was her. Saturday matinée every week; I was Celeste and you were my hero, until the final scene where I became yours. I was yours.

Never destined for the dream,

But still, every Saturday I can’t resist. I go to the telephone table, I pick up the note with my name on it, snuggle into my favourite chair and as slowly as I can, I read every line; and I am Celeste again.

For so many years I couldn’t understand why this longing didn’t last past the weekend, but that was before I knew me.

I’m sorry and I do…

I love you

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About Littlebeut333

'Random Spillages from a Reportedly Strange mind’… Hello all :) I’m Dawny, the littlest of the Beuts..and my brain spillage content varies from the profoundly philosophical, to utter bilge ://…Life is my inspiration. I write about friends, love, the soul, society, shrinks, people, labels, home, mothers, perfect moments, dirty politicians, music, pain, beauty, women, religion, god, mental health, the demise of humanity!!! etc…hence the ‘random’. All spilled through the eye of my ‘ever musing, slightly philosophical mind’. Although I write mostly for enjoyment, and to empty my oh so busy head; sharing my snippets appeals to me, and I also love reading the thought trails of others. I would be most chuffed if anyone comes across my page and has a browse (and if you do, thanks in advance). I guess the biggest compliment would be if, for you, my rambles are either :- slightly different from the norm, enjoyable, amusing, unenjoyable, and/or thought/emotion provoking. Whatever them thoughts or emotions might be…The good, the bad, the ugly..and everything in between!! ;)… I accidently fell in love with writing a while ago, and from that time, my inspiration has come solely from lifes varied encounters, feelings, knowledge, memories and thoughts. Welcome to my archives, to some sections of my mind :0 Dawny

2 responses

  1. Ahhh curledtails, I can’t thankyou enough for your sweet words, I is very flattered. I have no idea where this one popped out from, but so glad you liked it. And as for you being an AMY fan, YAY all day, I’m now watching her on dvd 😉 Thanks so much for your motivating abd beautiful comment. Now off to check oot your page too, Dawny 😉