Daily Archives: March 13, 2012

Necessary and tragic public note to self (Bilge Alert)

Status

La nueva Isobel

Dawny…

You have been typing bilge on your blog for 5 days now! 5 days!!!

You have been awake for too long, even by your standards

Life is not all about Indulgence, you have new responsibilities this year and you must step up. You are doing all work forms TODAY! TUESDAY!

Get off of Word Press until at least Friday morning

Go to the website your meant to be on all day, follow the links to the unseen activities and do some fooooooooking research into the coronary heart disease in Norfolk, or else you WLL FAIL the module.

Go to bed soon, you have 2 workmen coming into your world for 8 hours a day, for 5 long days. This makes you slightly insaner than normal; and you must prepare for the extra insanity by turning off this monitor!

You don’t know where the tea bags are, or the cat biscuits… and you need to find them both before 7am, and you need to take the 467 empty champagne bottles to the bottle bank before Mum gets here

You have a cold and no will power, and you need to go to the drop in centre for another asthma pump and some anti-biotics, before you get a bronchial infection and craps on the lungs, for the 3rd time in 3 months

Get a Grip…Go…Post this as a threat to yourself; and a continual reminder of your required abstinence here UNTIL Friday; and then shut me down!

And yourself!

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Now!

Farewell Bloggus-sphere…at least untill my will power cracks

Advertisements

The World, The Police, The Normal and The Surreal…

Standard

A Metropolitan Police Service photographer fil...

For the last few weeks, I’ve been watching this series on policing in England; and needless to say, I’ve been shocked at some of the acts I’ve seen…varying from immense kindness to immense brutality

It seems we (British people) tolerate our policemen smashing the shit out of certain innocent people with metal bats; so long as they are ultra polite when they issue our speeding tickets; which they ALWAYS are!

Then I got to thinking about how much we take for granted as normal…ONLY because we’re used to it.

Thanks to Easy Jet and the birth of tiny toiletries, I was able to go on several cheapy cheap foreign adventures in the last few years. And I ran into the police on 2 of the 3 trips…

First, I went to Krakow in Poland and the gargantuan river Wisla was minutes away from bursting its banks when I arrived. There were sandbags, people and police everywhere; and camcorders! It seems it’s a bit of an entertaining event for the people of Krakow; watching the river swell til it’s too late to run away.

I for one, was getting out of there…

WELL; I dared to attempt to cross a very busy, ‘scarily wide’ road, and apparently; I was not meant to be there

The first I knew of this crime I’d committed, was when the police man I was standing ahead of, accelerated like the Stig (from Top Gear)…and launched his car at me full pelt… until the bumper was an inch from my knees. He then slammed the car to a halt, screeching brakes included; wound down his window; (as did the other Loony copper in the passenger seat) Read the rest of this entry