Please take a trip down memory lane with me… back to the days of videos/ VHS’s and VCR players.
Do you remember putting a video into its house? If not, let me remind you what used to happen…you pushed the VHS into the slot and before you had a chance to do anything, it would automatically start playing the film. You had to press stop at least twice, before the player took any notice of you whatsoever.
Once the video had stopped, you were able to press re-wind (how inconvenient it used to be, if you forgot to rewind the film the last time you watched it)
Then along came DVD’s… and everyone was chuffed to bits with the idea that they didn’t need to rewind anymore.
All that time saved? (My ass ;))
Maybe it would have been a great idea, if it wasn’t for some imbecile in the design office, who clearly had some kind of fetish for the play button!
The very first time I place a shiny round DVD into its player, it didn’t launch into the film like the joyous VHS. Instead, in front of my eyes were the words
Play and play or play and play…
So I pressed play and I got another screen saying ‘Play the whole thing?’ ‘Or play pieces of it?’
It would seem they want you to be really really really sure…that you want to watch the whole film
Another great element of the invention of the DVD was that you could play re- wind or fast forward quickly with a remote control, and they decided that the remote control was sooooo wonderful; they removed all function buttons from the DVD player itself… (But, they didn’t really take into consideration the fact that – 50% of the population have at least one remote control missing, all the time!)
They also cleverly listed each episode separately, to save you time! This would have been wonderful…except, if your remote control goes walk about forever, you only get to watch the first episode, out of the 6 episodes, on your disk…
Added to this, they like to ask you up to 4 times, what else you would like to play? You can choose scene selections, you can choose to view certain chapters, and you can choose to watch the film with the director’s commentary over the top (not irritating at all)
And with all this amazing multiple choice viewing…if you are unlucky enough to be remote control-less, you have no access to the DOWN button.
Sooooo you will be watching the extended directors cut in Spanish with Lithuanian subtitles, whether you asked for it or not!
Bring back the VHS…
I just wanna watch the bleeding film 😉