When Obligation becomes Want-anation


Some time ago I was talking to an old friend about love and he suggested that loving and caring behaviours are nothing more than obligations… forced upon us by society

Others argue that women have been bitch slapped into unhealthy fairy tales by Walt Disney and the like. Proposing that most women have idealistic and unrealistic aims when it comes to finding and maintaining loving relationships

Well, I have just watched ‘Love Actually’ for the umpteenth time, and I noticed that every time I welled up with tears… I also got goosebumps!

I checked out the reason for this and found out that goosebumps are linked to the part of the brain that controls our emotional responses

If love is nothing more than an obligatory act, how come our entire bodies react to it in the same way every time love or its side effects are displayed? Either in person, or through movies and songs

And all these men that claim they are far too evolved to feel the same, obviously haven’t been to any weddings lately – Generally the groom, against all intents and purposes, blubs like a baby when he sees his almost wife, walking down the aisle towards him

Few get through their vows without the lump in the throat extending, the emotion (the love) literally chokes them as they struggle to say 2 little words (I do)

Why are men still getting down on one knee if they are so immune to love? And how do they explain their physiological reactions to something that is considered an empty obligation, nothing more than a word?

Maybe when we all started out, love was just a word, but in the year 2012, I am definitely not the only one who has these bodily reactions, in response to demonstrations of love

And if we have evolved to the point where our body and mind are so intrinsically wired to love…’love’, then sometime long ago, we were just as much slaves to it then as we are now. It has been a necessity for long enough to cause our body mind and spirit to react to it simultaneously and involuntarily, and all in different ways

Love isn’t even a want for most people, neither is it an obligation, it is a ‘need-anation’

So perhaps their theories are correct but in the wrong order

Maybe the theory of obligation started because we want and need love, so we have organised our society in a way that attaches behaviours to the obligation – of having it and giving it

It is not the obligation itself which is unnatural, but the expectations that we attach to it, which often run against its essence

Why do we have these expectations? – Cos we’re all addicted to the stuff… and we do all that we can to cling onto it when we find it, and the dodgy behaviours that run against its tide, are simply human errors that thin with age

Love Rocks!!! Always… even when we screw it up!!!

About Littlebeut333

'Random Spillages from a Reportedly Strange mind’… Hello all :) I’m Dawny, the littlest of the Beuts..and my brain spillage content varies from the profoundly philosophical, to utter bilge ://…Life is my inspiration. I write about friends, love, the soul, society, shrinks, people, labels, home, mothers, perfect moments, dirty politicians, music, pain, beauty, women, religion, god, mental health, the demise of humanity!!! etc…hence the ‘random’. All spilled through the eye of my ‘ever musing, slightly philosophical mind’. Although I write mostly for enjoyment, and to empty my oh so busy head; sharing my snippets appeals to me, and I also love reading the thought trails of others. I would be most chuffed if anyone comes across my page and has a browse (and if you do, thanks in advance). I guess the biggest compliment would be if, for you, my rambles are either :- slightly different from the norm, enjoyable, amusing, unenjoyable, and/or thought/emotion provoking. Whatever them thoughts or emotions might be…The good, the bad, the ugly..and everything in between!! ;)… I accidently fell in love with writing a while ago, and from that time, my inspiration has come solely from lifes varied encounters, feelings, knowledge, memories and thoughts. Welcome to my archives, to some sections of my mind :0 Dawny

One response »

  1. Silly friend! Of course we need love. But I think you have to be taught how love goes, by your parents, otherwise you have trouble feeling it, and then you convince yourself it doesn’t exist.

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