Category Archives: Philosophy

Medicated Memories…I’m Everything Without Contents!

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I’m angry without the anger

I care with flatlined clichéd pity

Without others I could slip by, abandoned

What is a soul without memories

***

In solace I know I’ve been stolen

Repressing all that makes me

Pushing away my spirited version of chatter

Sitting firmly on top of rusty springs

Bearing heavy….Heavy on the heart

*** Read the rest of this entry

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That 4 Letter Word…Causes All The Strife, Causes All of Life, Awakens Our Inner Wife, Cuts Like a Knife, Our Fuel For This Life…

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Love ? I love love love you.When God said – Love is all there is… I understand now the depth and breadth of love’s business

When we are all children, its intensity rules all

And the very next heart beat after we first feel it, the fear of losing it ignites

It stays there throughout school

Then there’s all this imperfection and pain in the world

And the only thing that fixes it is the very thing that causes it

Love is the only perfect gift on the planet

But if we give and receive it from a damaged source, it becomes pain filled and painful, blocked, cruel, lost, mis-directed, overwhelming, mis-understood…

At worst, it dresses up as abuse – mental, physical, sexual or spiritual

When 2 people fall in love, it envelopes your insides, causing joy, ecstasy, warmth, addiction, desire, longing, kindness, insanity, inspiration, hope, happiness, thoughfulness

When the bond is damaged it dresses as mistrust, revenge, power, confusion, patience, truth and lies

When illness threatens to break its bond it dresses to fit – as care, dedication, forgiveness, pain, hurt, even what feels like hatred, loyalty, compromise, explanations, ’emotionally charged right up’ love, fear, too much, too little, perception spectacles of many different colours Read the rest of this entry

Addictive Genes and Sad Souls…Do We Inherit Sadness?

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I was 6 or 7 years old when my first addiction began, I used to get £1 for dinner money, and everyday my Mum would see me over the main road and wave goodbye; off I would trot to meet the two friends who I walked to school with.

The gap between her wave goodbye, and the knock on my friends front door, was the best part of my day

I remember the feeling of excitement as I rushed to the shop at the bottom of our estate, where I would buy 10 packets of ‘Cheesies’ and 10 packets of ‘Meanies’ (small bags of 5p crisps)

I don’t know how I knew that it needed to be a secret, but I knew it alright; I knew it intrinsically. So; I would eat ALL 20 packets in rapid time, and by the time I reached my friend’s house, I had consumed them all, and my secret was safe

By lunchtime, I was starving, every single day… and I knew that if I could stop buying the crisps, I’d be able to eat lunch with my friends. I regretted it everyday, whilst I watched everyone eating their lunch; but I didn’t stop…because I couldn’t stop, Read the rest of this entry

An update on my post entitled ‘If your partner is ‘Crazy’, run for the hills’

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Eyes of the Insane

I wrote a post this week entitled ‘If your partner is ‘Crazy’, run for the hills (The World, 2012)… How rude!

Here is the comment it generated (all comments are appreciated but this one gripped my appreciative shit!)

“The article is right and wrong at the same time.
I too wouldn’t advise anyone to love a crazy person as most people aren’t capable of it.
In order to love a crazy person, you first have to love yourself, as the love you receive from a crazy person, or at least the perception of it, may be entirely different than one would expect. It may also manifest itself in many indirect manners, which some people find hard to accept.
It takes two things to love a crazy person, well three actually, strength, patience, acceptance and self-love. I guess that’s four, i really should learn how to count one of these days.
But then applying to love a crazy person is like applying to join the special forces, it’s not for anyone and only those who are worthy will find it the most rewarding job in the world”

I can honestly say I was enraged when I read this, and also very touched at the army reference ;), but both reactions did little to stem the massive thought trail that followed

I quote from the comment…It takes patience, strength, acceptance and self-love…..[to love a crazy person]. Yes it does, not just to love the crazy people and not just to love the sane….but to love both Read the rest of this entry

‘Psychosis is a necessity; for the emotional development of certain people’?(Moi, 2012)

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Love, Life and Feelings

I think it would be a fair generalisation to say that : – People who suffer from periods of psychosis, tend to be thinkers. Not just in bouts of insanity; but all the time…

I’ve just mind meandered onto this odd theory/definition of psychosis…

‘Psychosis is a necessity; for the emotional development of certain people’ 😉 (Moi, 2012)

Thinkers can fall into the trap of over thinking and under feeling. If you’re a thinker, you’re likely a problem solver… and before you know it, you’ve totally lost touch with your feelings because you’ve rationalised the shit out of; not feeling anything

But when delusions loom, in my experience…they are always intrinsically linked to 3 things

Fear/Terror

Shame

Pain

For me at least, these 3 categories cover everything that I choose not to dwell on as a thinker. Everything I don’t want to feel sits under these umbrellas… Read the rest of this entry

‘Amy and The Mice’ – An Alternative Take

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English: Baby mice about a day old

Of all the Amy Winehouse footage to cause a wave of disapproval, this video sits up there with best of them

In order to see the beauty that I see in this scene, you must first remove the judgements you already have about Crack and its use (although it is worth noting that Crack is probably the most likely drug to cause aggression). If you can’t remove your judgements; try swopping the word crack for wine (which also causes aggressive outbursts)

And re-classify her status more loosely; as a little bit ‘worse for wear’ (legally of course)

Then check out the video Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty on drugs – YouTube.

Or read the manuscript below, complete with stage cues and action descriptions

What I see is : – heart, endless wit, depth of passion, fun, boundless amounts of life, imagination, creativity, laughter, beauty, friendship, a unique and highly sweet soul, the interaction of two friends, love, vulnerability, fascination, curiosity, loyalty, care and protection…This is what I see, black fingers or no black fingers. Can you?

(Amy is in green, Pete in orange, Both together in red)

Amy collects a box of baby mice from the back of the room Read the rest of this entry

If you can’t get a life; At least reach for some thoughts…you ‘Bitter Buggers!’ ;)

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Revenge of the Zombies

Evolve people PLEASE! For Betty's Sake!

As a rule, I’m not a judgy person

I have an ability to see two sides of most situations; so when I see someone behaving like a twat, I can normally find some inner mercy for their idiot views/behaviours. Cos we’re all the way we are; because of where we’ve been and what happened when we got there!

However

My blind spot lies in my upbringing in Jolly Old Leytonstone. For all the many cultures I lived amongst, for all the differences I’ve bounced between, there was a steady message that permeated the lot in sunny East London, back in the day…

You DO NOT grass!

And you certainly DO NOT grass to the powers that be…

Unfortunately this little lesson didn’t reach 120 miles down the road

TRAGIC, in the eyes of Dawny…

During the last hose pipe ban in Norfolk, 35,000 people made the effort to sign onto the web, type in ‘Grass hotline number for Anglian Sewerage Co please’…and then they paid 20p to grass their next door neighbour up, for washing their car!

WTF??? Do any of you even know who has a hose pipe or an outside tap in your street? Read the rest of this entry

You will remember; Until you learn to Forget…and then you will remember

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Brain scanning technology is quickly approachi...HeartEnglish: Holistic health, body, mind, heart, soul

Soul Versus Mind Versus Heart – Rounds 1, 2, 3 and 4

When you try

When you really try

It is simply astounding, the amount we CAN CHOOSE to forget (mind wins)

But one day; one day; life will catch your professional soul off guard (soul wins…the soul does not forget; what the heart and mind try to filter out)

So; you will remember Read the rest of this entry

The World, The Police, The Normal and The Surreal…

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A Metropolitan Police Service photographer fil...

For the last few weeks, I’ve been watching this series on policing in England; and needless to say, I’ve been shocked at some of the acts I’ve seen…varying from immense kindness to immense brutality

It seems we (British people) tolerate our policemen smashing the shit out of certain innocent people with metal bats; so long as they are ultra polite when they issue our speeding tickets; which they ALWAYS are!

Then I got to thinking about how much we take for granted as normal…ONLY because we’re used to it.

Thanks to Easy Jet and the birth of tiny toiletries, I was able to go on several cheapy cheap foreign adventures in the last few years. And I ran into the police on 2 of the 3 trips…

First, I went to Krakow in Poland and the gargantuan river Wisla was minutes away from bursting its banks when I arrived. There were sandbags, people and police everywhere; and camcorders! It seems it’s a bit of an entertaining event for the people of Krakow; watching the river swell til it’s too late to run away.

I for one, was getting out of there…

WELL; I dared to attempt to cross a very busy, ‘scarily wide’ road, and apparently; I was not meant to be there

The first I knew of this crime I’d committed, was when the police man I was standing ahead of, accelerated like the Stig (from Top Gear)…and launched his car at me full pelt… until the bumper was an inch from my knees. He then slammed the car to a halt, screeching brakes included; wound down his window; (as did the other Loony copper in the passenger seat) Read the rest of this entry

Ripping Innocent Daisies to Shreds!

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English: This is the real Petal. All the other...

Girls, do you think I'm in there or what?

Little girls play this game;

They played it when I was tiny; I played it when I was tiny; and they still play it now…

They pick a flower from the ground, and one after the other; they pull off every petal

Each time they tear away a pretty petal, from its life force…

They say the words

He loves me!?…

He loves me not!?

He loves me!?…

He loves me not!?

 

Personally, I think this game speaks volumes about how girls and boys view love.

(Alert – Huge sweeping generalisation or two, on the way) Read the rest of this entry

Short Number 8 – What’s the worst that can happen?

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"A Negro Hung Alive by the Ribs to a Gall...

The very worst…of the human condition?

Pain

It’s just pain

You’ve lived it before

And you will, again

Now; you have no excuse for not doing everything you ever dreamed of

‘I said go out there and get hurt…And please don’t forget to enjoy the ride’

(47 words)

I Miss You…(No hidden Insult Intended)

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‘I miss you’

I’ve noticed that this phrase, causes strange reactions in peopleThe Best of Missing Persons

I blame this reaction on the phenomena known as poxy ‘sub text’

Why do people hear I miss you and think you’re actually saying…You are neglecting me

Why do people hear I miss you and think you’re actually saying…You don’t make time for me anymore

Why do people hear I miss you and think you’re actually saying…We are growing apart

When I say I miss you…It’s because I miss you

And I miss you because I think you’re great; because I love talking to you; because I love that I am lucky enough to be able to call you my friend; because I appreciate your advice; because I love how you make me laugh; because I want to know how you are; because I am blessed to have you in my life…and because you are impossible to forget. Read the rest of this entry

Words are no use whatsoever really…Not for understanding!

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Juño is a word with great meaning, which only ...

Come Again Please?

Today’s random thoughts on ‘making sense’.

For every word of every language, there are multiple dictionary definitions, as well as the other definitions that are formed by our individual brains and experiences…

When discussing this earlier, this example explained the human ‘part’

Boy says…..’I’m shy’…..He says this with a whole host of memories, and feelings, and experiences, which have shaped his meaning of shy

Girl hears……’I’m shy’……She then processes this with her whole host of memories, and feelings, and experiences, which have shaped her meaning of shy

Their own understanding’s of ‘shy’ are different……as are the implications that the word ‘shy’ holds.

Now if every word has mass multiple definitions AND meanings, you then have to consider that people and their circles, naturally use words, with a COMPLETELY different meaning to the dominant and/or dictionary one’s, as they form their own little language communities. They then use these words OUTSIDE of their circles, when talking to people who have no idea WTF they meant by that 🙂

After all this confusion… Read the rest of this entry

The Curse of the Blogging Student…

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English: This is a cover of the novel, the curse.

Once you’ve been exposed to writing for your own, unrestrained narcissistic pleasure, your studies will be ruined FOREVER!

I used to enjoy the challenge of finding the ‘bestest’ and most eloquent phrases to explain my evidence

There was a day when I felt passion typing sentences like this :-

Dahlgren and Whiteheads diagram (Bird and Whitehead, 2012, p. 51) includes age, constitution and sex; drawing the powerful medical discourse, into the analysis. Marmot’s wide concept of the causes of health inequalities; allows all the evidence from different socioeconomic circumstances, to be considered in relation to health.

Until; the discovery of blogging. I found myself spreading my little writing wings, and I got to ramble on about sociology and Erving Goffman, whilst slipping in phrases such as ‘Trust the Goff’ and ‘He was one of the spangliest social thinkers ever to grace our pooey earth’…

AND

Now that I have experienced the joy of being able to write spangly in a sentence

Now that I’ve been exposed to the wonder of being allowed to wink when I’m writing…well; my essays of joy have become

DRY DRY DRY AND PAINFUL AND…DRY

In spite of all the bilge I write here, I have never been so drained and bored, reading my own shite, as I was this morning (hard to believe I know ;)) Read the rest of this entry

TEN Do’s/Dont’s… to make marriage successful in life (x3)

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Marriage Equality Press Conference

Marriage Equality Conference

Prep…

Get engaged twice but don’t make it down the aisle. Ideally you will call off one wedding; and at the other, you will be stood up at the altar; or just before you get to the altar.

This way, you learn all you need to about rejection, on both sides of the coin…

Find the location of your heart, and purify it as much as possible

Then you are ready for the grand plan.

  1. WITHOUT A VICAR present, Marry a friend who would never ever wish to sleep with you and vice versa; so, make sure they have the opposite sexuality to you; or ensure you are at least 8 points away from each other, in the league tables
  2. Make sure this friend is truly spandangly of heart, and you have a marriage made in heaven that will last forever. You get a best friend, who loves you even when you smell; who will love you when your fat and thin, equally. And you can safely love them with no fear of divorce… like ever, plus, you both still have real marriage as an option in your life; for any new finds.
  3. Then; spare marry someone else who you find sexually attractive and rather wonderful… but is impenetrable. All lonely broken souls, cannot resist the lure of a spare spouse. Be as spare wonderful as you can, to your spare spouse… and you will have 2 marriages that will last forever
  4. Make sure the spare candidate lives around 500 miles away; so that you can’t get spare sick of each other, even if you tried 😉 Read the rest of this entry

Imperfection breeds Perfection in Abundance…

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bubbles  Perfect moments are things that come once or twice in a decade, they are fleeting and normally unexpected. They mostly come on days where they are least likely to happen, or in moments where they have no explanation. But they are far from forgettable, even when indefinable. They burn themselves onto the memory stems of our brain; forever.

And unlike pain…they never fade

And they never lose their magic

My first came on a walk; from the toilets, back to the tent on a summer’s day, with the assistance of Sade; dads and babies; friends; lovers; an amazing subwoofer; and multiple swaying bodies

My second involved 3 children who were at first, separated, looking at each other with the self-consciousness of adults. Staring with the awkwardness of teenagers, and reeking with the transparent vulnerability of a child. The 4 of us were positioned in a large circle, one at each compass point. Totally apart; but all in view of one another. I’d just bought a bottle of bubbles from the shop, and to pass the time I began blowing. Read the rest of this entry

Bugger It! I’m moving to Russia, they love the occassional drop of ‘Red Mist’ ;)

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Angry Talk (Comic Style)

Beep Beep; you F****!"$ Beep

OK, today I had a mind meander onto anger, aggression and the queen of stifled anger, Ms Passivo Agressive-us. Here it is…

I was a rage filled teenager and we could argue all day over why I was angry; but only half of you would agree on these reasons as any sort of explanation

So I will just tell you that I was angry, pretty much all day, every-day, and I am not proud to say that I had many fights when I was young (younger sorry ;))

What is a bit strange is this…Even whilst I was fighting, I hated violence and I hated doing it, in the moment; and for all the damage I did with my feet, I was never able to punch anyone in the face.

Now, just seeing two people fight makes me feel physically sick!

But sometimes, I still do not have control. A few moths back, I was out drinking with my gals on a rare night out, we had just left this cool little pub that has a piano in it, and I busted out a dodgy rendition of ‘Yesterday’ on the untuned keys, we all sang, made a lot of noise, and ohhhhh we laughed and laughed. A bit like a scene from an old London pub from the ‘Hippy-Days’. It was a great night and I certainly wasn’t angry. Drink generally makes me tell people I love them until I fall asleep.

THEN Read the rest of this entry

‘First Love to Last’…What becomes of the ‘Broken-Hearted’?

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Love Love Love

This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine, let it shine, let it shine, let it shine...

What becomes of the broken-hearted?

So many people describe their 1st love as unique; millions stand by the idea that there is no love like it…nothing comes near to your 1st love right?

It took me years to get over my 1st love; so I get the roots of this thinking, I do.

But I don’t think it’s for the reasons we think…

Is it the love that’s unique?

Or just the experience?

When we have our heart broken for the very 1st time, it is NEW and immensely painful. And we just don’t know how to deal with it. We feel shock; immense grief; confusion; depression and helplessness. We are overwhelmed, empty, and without any skills from past experience to even compare it to. Many of us revert back to infantile ways, to cope with the pain, because we don’t know any other way…

Please take a meander with me, onto my friend who is a ‘Soldier’ Read the rest of this entry

‘Happy 1st Birthday’ … Pretty Page of Bilge/Wisdom/Joy/Confusion &/or Inspiration

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I can’t quite believe how many spillages I’ve leaked already (Or perhaps I can)… My blog is a year old today! I promised my pretty page I’d so something to honour the occasion, and decided I’d pick a post from each month. It didn’t quite pan out like that; for many a reason.

Anyway, I ended up picking 13 posts; and in the random blog spirit, they encompass a selection of varied bilge. Each post has a little summary of why it made the ‘Grand 1st Anniversary’ line up. I hope you enjoy the re-cap, and I really hope you come back for a whole ‘nother year.

One last thing before I begin the un-veiling, I’d just like to say an enormous and humble ‘Thank-You’ to all my treasured visitors, new and old. You warm my cockles, ohhh you dooooo, that, you do…

I want to be a Tree

Tree Silhouettes

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/02/21/i-want-to-be-a-tree/

I chose this one because although I am a pooey and retired poet; I thought perhaps I should slam 1 in, for variety and nostalgia ;). This poem is what I imagine life to be like in a perfect avenue, full of lovely, wise, tree people. I don’t even necessarily want everyone to be a tree, just those people in the world who are most crappy; those people probably need to be trees more than anyone. But they won’t be trees.

Yet, other’s will.

Such is life.

Pretty please don’t take away my ‘Yellow Knees of Liberty’ 

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/03/15/pretty-please-dont-take-away-my-yellow-knees-of-liberty/

Hardly a literary prize winner. However, this post represents one of the most surreal nights of my life. I gained 6 points on my licence. I drove for 8 hours trying to reach the foooooooking 02 car park, so I could get on the tube from there, and continue the journey.

I thought I was gonna keel over, slumped onto the steering wheel, the stress was that immense!

English: Daewoo Matiz.

It was an important journey because reaching the destination was also, the only way to accertain just how loopy I was at the time. I lost 2 hub caps; peeeeeed in several inappropriate places in Central London; and at 5am I got out of the car to the 3rd copper ‘pulling me over’.

(Well; the 1st one didn’t pull me over; he wandered across to the driver’s side, after I nearly wiped him out of existence, kerb side! The curve crept up on me and I accidently half mounted the path at around 30mph; and I lost hub cap 1, right there)

Sorry, back to the 3rd copper

The buckle had indeed fell off of my belt; and, as I stood up to meet my maker from the Metropolitian Police Force, my jeans began to fall down!. He evicted me from London pronto; and issued a harsh warning about my narrow escape from a LIST of criminal charges. He ended the scene by asking me if I had a map? So I passed him the highly creased and stressed Atlas of Great Britain, circa 1988. He said ‘I don’t wnat it, I was asking if YOU had a map, for YOU”

If I went past the sign for Bow ONCE, which I can assure you I DID, I must of passed it 68 times! And my yellow/gold knees (aka Blanche), ended up stealing my liberty later anyway; by robbing me of £2000 in a year; fixing the beautiful little beast!

Beware the Daewoo Matiz…cute but costly, and akin to a pushchair; in terms of quality, build and road safety standards…

Thank You, Happy Birthday

When you

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/04/05/when-you/

I do believe I was…’Einstein like’ with my wisdom in this ‘ere post.

You wanted! – Census of The Mind 2011

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/04/27/you-wanted-census-of-the-mind-2011/

I chose this because I was born with anti-establishment DNA, and LORDY lord; I think my rant about the :-

“nosey, cheeky, exploitative, nosey, thieving, nosey, double standards, nosey, little pooey, “WHOOOOO do they think they are? Power crazy swindlers”

lasted 23.5 minutes. Passions fire…

Also, I had great dreams for this post

I imagined reams of snippets of people’s minds, flooding in like billio…reality then hit; and although the comments were somewhat thinner on the ground; they weren’t remotely thin in quality. This is my blogs version of a very cool time capsule of the mind. And the mind is my favourite thing; except for maybe kisses and laughing!

Life is A Stage and we are the Actors, Go learn your lines ‘Chameleon’s’

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/05/28/life-is-a-stage-and-we-are-the-actors-go-learn-your-lines-chameleons/

When I started blogging, I had a dream 😉 My blog had a dream and Deena fulfilled it, for details please see her comment below the post.

Thank-you again…

Pelican 0 14 02.1350 3

As well as being the stuff of dreams for my pretty page and me toooo…

When I learnt this information from Goffman; it literally changed my life instantly! I was compelled to share the love…I think my jaw stayed on the floor for a week; and I spent 7 of the quietest days of my life; watching everyone; me dumbfounded; muttering

“Fuck me Goffman, you have just explained life in its entirety to me, and sent me out into the world with new eyes; they are seeing far more, than they did before.”

“Where are you? I’m not sure what to do with all this right information right now but…”

(Ohhhh let me/us ALL experiment…in ‘Deviating from the Script’)

Trust ‘The Goff’, the elite are always as uncomfortable with my altered script; as the nation was when Nick Griffin appeared on ‘Question Time’! Dum Dum Duuuuuuuum! And THEN, he said people of all skin colours were welcome in his vision for the nation!

Nick…

Here’s a flicked V for you; from my naughty rude page; not me; my page

Don’t put me on the ‘possible up riser’ list please

Oh it’s OK Nick, it was a peace sign! Sorry, it’s dark in here

Mothers, the Invisible Vilified Heroes of Humanity

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/05/03/mothers-the-invisible-vilified-heroes-of-humanity/

English: Breastfeeding the baby.

Literally, I still cannot imagine anything more testing, difficult, thank-less, tiring, scary, selfless and ‘freedom quashing’ than motherhood. The older I get, the more I am in awe and amazement at the sacrifice women make every day, invisibaly bringing their kids up, right in front of our blind eyes.

I find it really sad that the care and love they give, is worth so little in our culture. I know not every-one is lucky enough to have an amazing mum, but my mum is the most fabulous gem on Gods Green Earth. She has given up everything for us; and my sister has done the same for her ‘Pops’.

I also chose this because my mum proudly sends it to everyone she knows (bless her), and she got all teary eyed when she read it. Which is nowt new as she is a bit of a weeper; but still, it was a special moment. And a rare opportunity to give her something back. Mothers Everywhere, I think you are just amazing.

Blood, Sweat (a little wee wee) and Tears of Laughter!

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/06/17/blood-sweat-a-little-wee-wee-and-tears-of-laughter/

English: the beixo compact-7 folding bike in a...

It needs no further explanation past the title really; without doubt; one of the funniest experiences and viewings of my life. My entire massive family, know about Trent and her mind blowing accident on ‘The Hawk’. This never fails to make me laugh and I love reading it because; I just emptied the memory onto the page. Sometimes I re-live it here, I can absorb it’s moment without any effort from the re-call section of my brain

Lil Trissus, stay off the roads FOREVER pleeeeease

Revenge is a ‘reflex action’, This is why we are Screwed ‘til further notice

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/07/28/revenge-is-a-reflex-action-this-is-why-were-screwed-til-further-notice/

English: Carving Knife Photographer: (L. B. Eh...

This was a bit of a learning curve in the making. Like all posts it began with a random thought and as I began writing, I realised I’d been ‘bitch slapped’ by fate, in order to grow past revenge. I had more experience in the field, than first thought!

And if anyone reads this, and finds themselves in the kind of deluded space I lived in (I’m still deluded, just differently now), feeling hurt all the time, and miserable. I hope this post shows them that maybe, just maybe, the way they are seeing things is not the way things are actually happening

It’s a tricky old path and the trouble with revenge is; when you decide to take it upon yourself to even the score. You are choosing to inflict pain or suffering on someone else, and if you believe in Karma even slightly, you need to see what you’re creating; all that pain is coming back your way. So really, it’s an exhausting no-brainer on all levels; It was a long and winding road, with plenty of side stepping! I can’t recommend the journey enough really.

Lived, Loved and Lost

Love Letters (Julie London album)

Anyone around in the early days of ze blog; may have read all about our great ‘Love’. Both our ‘rise and fall’ (and middle come to think of it) were touched upon here countless times; from an outside view, maybe a tad excessively? But the posts were nothing in quantity; not compared to the abundance of everything I had… when love lived here for a wee while.

For the first time in my life, I lived, loved and lost like a proper grown up.

He was such a big part of my life in this 1st year of Random Spillages, I can;’t comfortably leave this love off of the list, and I didn’t fancy re-reading posts from our ‘rise’

So you’re getting an entry from ‘Morose Town’. An extract from our ‘fall’

You could always visit the love category on my page if you’re interested in our rising love. I’ve been so busy being rageous, I didn’t really notice I’d calmed down. A bit of reflection later and; if he was ever to read this; I’d want him to know that I thank him, for everything…

The Circle of life rolls round AGAIN

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2012/02/09/the-circle-of-life-rolls-round-again/

London Capsule

I like this post. It was a rare moment in my life when I felt proud of myself, and also, like I wanted to stand on my own throat for killing my Ukulele. But the philosophical little lamb within, loved this experience.

Because the subsequent ‘creating and destroying’ thought that followed, was a perfect match.

Also, I doooooo laugh at the picture of the foot (and as I am known for roaring at my own jokes sometimes)… I’ll admit I am tickled everytime I see

‘Not my foot, just a foot’.

I don’t know why it tickles me so greatly, but it does. Small minds and all that…

Ohhhhh Alby, Trust you to Nab the 100th Post position

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2012/02/01/ohhhh-alby-trust-you-to-nab-the-100th-post-position/

English: Stella Artois sign

My amazing old step dad is cashing in on the fame list again. Ohhhhh Alby, first you steal my 100thy post position, and now you’re in my anniversary list on my blogs birthday!

Writing this was such a joy, and me and Trissus roared at all the memories for hours.

Now for the spooky bit!

The most memorable of his phrases, by far, was, “Can you see me, can you see me now?” And bugger me, as I was pressing the PUBLISH button on his post, an advert came on the TV for a film, and anyone who knows me will vouch for the fact that I am incapable of tuning into adverts. INCAPABLE! I see one a year, tops. But this loud (as they always are) trailer came on; and this guy stood in the middle of the screen and shouted right at me… ‘Can you see me?’

It freaked me right out

Oh and then there was a film on friday night, I think it was actually some sort of :- ‘Renegade the Movie’! Stop haunting me and nicking my baking trays you bugger! Love you

Cat Love, far more than one might think

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/09/15/cat-love-far-more-than-one-might-think/

D05_7602

A philosophical and humuorous lesson for us all in here I think,

And an ODE to my baby boys. I would be truly lost without Mr Shamone and Mr Rurch… and their Rhino styleeee head butts of devastation. They are still the ‘lights of my life’

English: Black and white cat with blue eyes

Forver Loved, Never Forgotten, Miss Amy Winehouse

English: Amy Winehouse at the Eurockéennes of 2007

Amy Amy Amy – Still the ‘Love of my Life’. I don’t feel that any poxy peeeeedly paragraph could ever do her justice, so I will pop the link here of some of her visual beauty… and shut up.

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2012/02/01/forever-loved-never-forgotten-miss-amy-winehouse/

And there you have it, a few of the Random Spillages from this Reportedly Strange Mind. All of which are a little bit special, in my eyes anyway…

Dawny Xxx

Short Number 5 – ‘The Psychiatrist and his Educated Empathy’

Standard

Rejection Therapy logo

“Am I ‘a character’, because I have character?”

Or?

“I think I’m scared”

“I don’t know what of”

“My emotions, my moods, maybe…”

Why?

“They’re so overwhelming; I’m not sure if I even have a base personality”

“Am I a real person?” Read the rest of this entry