Category Archives: Thoughts

When Mensa Take The Piss (part 2)

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Clues

Hilary is playing sudoku in the green room

Edith has a budgie who swears like a navvy

Ron has severe amnesia, Julie is his carer, and just reminded him of their trip to the supermarket that morning

 

Fill in the blanks

fillRon has proposed to the budgie _ times

Hilary has two 9’s in one row. How much was the book to buy _

Does Edith use Wiltshire farm foods. If yes, how often? _

 

(Chortle Chortle :))

Success! One little word…One larger Irk!

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I don’t know why I hate dislike the word success so much

Except I do

1) I think someone’s trying to tell me that, sooner or later, I/we will be ‘good’ enough to achieve success, and I automatically presume it is meant in the British sense, work work work, get a career, find a mate, have kids etcsuccess 6

2) My idea of success is not inline with the mainstream idea. Success to me is about who I am as a person, and how I am doing at ‘being’ (as in, to just ‘be’ me)

3) I realise that someone probably wrote that piece about success, due to their own ideas about what that is and how best to help someone achieve it. Then I’m torn between posting this moan insert and possibly pooping on some other blogger that has mentioned success today… (sorry dear blogger if this is the case) and being true to my blogs purpose, which is to express myself (and I also sometimes hope to inspire others when I’m not moaning)

BUT… Read the rest of this entry

A Hearbreaking Choice, A Second Chance, A Mothers Letters of Love

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To my darling daughter… the light of my life and my reason for living! Time has dragged so slowly since I wrote to you last month, I’ve been counting down the days til I could again. I really hope school is still being good to you 🙂 You told me a little bit about your friend Alice in your last letter, she sounds like a great friend! I’d love to hear about your other friends when you next write to me. 

So… has school taught you anything yet that really impressed you? God! As usual, I wanna ask you so much, but also tell you so much…

I want you to know that you can ask or tell me anything, absolutely anything. I’m not only your birth mother, I’m your best friend too. If you can’t go to your parents about something, no matter how wrong or scary or private it feels, you can tell me. I am impossible to shock so when I say anything, I really mean anything 🙂

Anyways, my little spring chicken, guess what!! ?? Thanks to your parents ongoing kindness, we get to see each other in less than 4 months! A  whole day together baby, I’m soooooo looking forward to it. What do you want to do? Where shall we go? I can’t believe your back in my life!!! I feel so blessed and I’m eternally grateful to your parents for this chance to get to know you…my darling daughter

I’ve been thinking like a wild thing about this months topic! I always start by asking myself ‘What do I want my baby girl to know and be?’ After sifting through boys, motherhood, hugs, racism and a ton of other topics, I finally landed on respect. I can only hope that I explain it in a way that makes sense Read the rest of this entry

Medicated Memories…I’m Everything Without Contents!

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I’m angry without the anger

I care with flatlined clichéd pity

Without others I could slip by, abandoned

What is a soul without memories

***

In solace I know I’ve been stolen

Repressing all that makes me

Pushing away my spirited version of chatter

Sitting firmly on top of rusty springs

Bearing heavy….Heavy on the heart

*** Read the rest of this entry

Don’t Worry…I’ll Google It! (Pet Peeeev’s)

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phoneMy ‘pet peeeev’ of the year so far has gotta be that bloody phrase we so often hear nowadays

“I’ll google it”

And that’s it for the next 20 minutes …you can kiss goodbye to any old school methods of communication (talking); whilst whoever has a smart phone insists that you snuggle into each others personal space to share the 3 inch screen, all for some crappy and very miniature video or webpage that proclaims to know the answer to everything

Not to mention the meandering onto the other phrase

“Just wait for it to load, it’s hilarious/clever/entertaining”

I really don’t like smart phones…They facilitate rudeness and increase irritation in living rooms all over the land

That is all for now…

If I was a Car!

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I would be too big at the backcar

I would have inconsistent and inexplicable oil needs

Prone to breakdowns during short haul journeys

My battery would be flat often, for no fathomable reason

Every MOT would be filled with never before seen malfunctions

I would accelerate prematurely (formula one styleeee) with ba mere tap on the gas pedal Read the rest of this entry

That 4 Letter Word…Causes All The Strife, Causes All of Life, Awakens Our Inner Wife, Cuts Like a Knife, Our Fuel For This Life…

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Love ? I love love love you.When God said – Love is all there is… I understand now the depth and breadth of love’s business

When we are all children, its intensity rules all

And the very next heart beat after we first feel it, the fear of losing it ignites

It stays there throughout school

Then there’s all this imperfection and pain in the world

And the only thing that fixes it is the very thing that causes it

Love is the only perfect gift on the planet

But if we give and receive it from a damaged source, it becomes pain filled and painful, blocked, cruel, lost, mis-directed, overwhelming, mis-understood…

At worst, it dresses up as abuse – mental, physical, sexual or spiritual

When 2 people fall in love, it envelopes your insides, causing joy, ecstasy, warmth, addiction, desire, longing, kindness, insanity, inspiration, hope, happiness, thoughfulness

When the bond is damaged it dresses as mistrust, revenge, power, confusion, patience, truth and lies

When illness threatens to break its bond it dresses to fit – as care, dedication, forgiveness, pain, hurt, even what feels like hatred, loyalty, compromise, explanations, ’emotionally charged right up’ love, fear, too much, too little, perception spectacles of many different colours Read the rest of this entry

From Rock, To Wi-Fi, To Heat Waves, Voiles and Snoring! OR A Selection of Bilge :)

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Christ Alive! And Seriouslybricks 4 ;/

I know that walls aren’t what they once were

As in; they used to be a foot thick…

Which was dandy!

However, these big old walls could have changed the future forever (See broken woman to the right)

bricks 5

Nowadays, they are in competition with walls as thick as ice cream wafers…disguised as brick

brick 2

Soon, the new housing estates will look like they are situated in the centre of a desert in the Middle East (peak of summer). The strange swirling mist that comes from heat waves, will distort the walls and the owners will put it down to the 45 degree heat…

Until…

Winter arrives; the dwellers become alarmed to see the walls still slopping around, with no heat swirls in sight, and many neighbours buying posh nets from the stall in the street

Because ‘Apparently they keep the heat in’bricks 6

Seriously, I can hear the man snoring loud as a bleeding train, and he lives in a whole ‘nother house!!!!!!!!

At least it was only 169 words of tripe

I’m out of the running…No More God Lives Here

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I dis-own myself as a creation of GOD

I know who I have always been, and what I have become over the years, I know what I have said and done, what I regret and why I regret it

I’m tired and because I finally love myself the same amount as I love everyone else, I choose not to fly the flag, and to stay as the un-known unseen thing called it

I know that the force I speak of, will always exist, but I am never ever ever ever coming back to this earth, I tried, Looks like I failed, but words mean nothing and everything, until all and one knows itself but doesn’t know why it does

Good Luck to ALL the Complex Gods in the Running

I myself, me like, just want out of this crappy unequal world as I see it, and I can’t see it as anyone else because I am me.

But I AM proud of me, what I have achieved before I ran out of strength, and as I dis-own the words and the deeds in font, I will just tell you that I am just like everyone else, imperfect, growing, hurting, shrinking and loving, unconditionally

Except I caught up with the force of love just in time to save myself from your games.

9 times you have used me, now you’ve got the best of me, come come on and take the rest of me.

100% = 102%, 99% for life as we know it, and 2 of the 3% are fake, I can do nothing more to convince you of my truths, so I’m done

Laters and may the force be with you…it always will be but I will not feel the pain of this life for nothing anymore

If announcing myself as letting you go, brings you the freedom you so desire, then maybe I was never meant to be here in the first place

I am love if love is GOD, but I can dis-own all the words and this soul, in order to save myself. And I am never ever ever ever ever coming back, which i’m sure will make your day. And it sure does make mine

I’m pig sick of the lot of ya right at this minute, there is no telling those who a) Can’t be told, and b) Don’t give a shit until further notice

Should any of you wish to know GOD as LOVE, and the creator, you can come and read these words, and KNOW they will always be true and were always true, love is here for you allways and forever, and I as a soul, choose never to march on this crappy earth again

Enjoy your games you sick sick people, I have put out a full on prayer that you will come back to yourself soon, very soon

I stil wish I could be given a chance to change the world, but not as me, this ego has flown the nest forever

I no longer wish or fame for me ONE IOTA

A tip – you might wanna stick a pound on the appendix, dizzy spells and goosebumps and a few nights where I got the ump and removed the sunshine for real, just to prove a point.

Now forget it all please and thank-you. Just know that one of your gods, is being as near to the devil as possible, with block aids, and borders on nations

Business is LOVE’s business, I shall stay where I chose to stay weeks ago, in the sea as a dolphin with the other 2 that I prevented in my dreams, still loved both of them though, believe it or not

Tooodles

Hope, Faith and Glory

Remember, I’m just little old me, but the forve will keep you all safe whereever I land, and it will stay that way until the end of time, LOVE will never leave you, but in order to get justice for us all, I’ve laid some GREAT plans, and I hope you topple your leaders, with song and dance. I have my OWN reasons for dis-owning myself in words, and that is to give myself true justice and the rest you will see when you are ready, unless free will and patience met in the middle

Heres hoping that the too good to be true comes true and that you forget it all but for some reason, know what you need to

FORGET it all, tip on the appendix and dizzyness

Love Littlebeut333 – A very clever pussy cat

Education Schmeducation!

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learning to ride a bike - _MG_2933

I was thinking today about – how utterly useless school is.

And it’s such a great shame, ‘cos all them hours and years could have been spent teaching us wonderful things, things that may have inspired us to chase our dreams!

Take geography, I have no idea what this subject is about after 10 years of learning about it, for one hour a week. What I do remember, is once learning about layers of soil, and wet soil, and dry gritty soil!

And now….I don’t give a shit where I am in the world, in fact, I don’t know where I live on the map (no shame, I just don’t care)

BUT, my lordy lord…Why oh why didn’t my geography teachers show me photo’s of the 7 Wonders of the World? Is this not a better start to igniting geographical fire, than soil?

Doofus’s! Read the rest of this entry

How to get Closure from… ‘Silently Obstinate Bull-Shitters’

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Closure…

It’s such an American term… but I fear its worldwide use has made it a necessary thing, a thing to find at the end of a relationship, for us all.

In most relationships, it comes without explanation. If you’re in one of those normal one’s where you’re both party to the demise and break up, then it’s not rocket science to read between the lines!

You don’t need to look at each other and say :- I don’t like you anymore, we argue all the time, it’s not been right for a long time, I screwed the gardener, oh don’t worry I screwed my secretary etc. You both kinda know as you’ve been living in reality…

BUT, what happens when you get dumped, and you’re not really sure why?

What about if you’re one of those people who waved your partner off for milk and bread one morning, It’s 6 years later, and you’re still waiting for them to come back?

Or perhaps, you woke up in your new twister chair to find your future husband gone, but the washing up dutifully completed? Read the rest of this entry

Short Number 15 – The Highs and Lows of Anxiety… and her buddy ‘Pam’

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Anxiety begins to brew, and sometimes it grows to the point where ‘Pam’ is required.

She does the job of Instilling the desired amount of ‘zombification’

But the next day, she gives you a big old ‘Pam-Over’

‘What goes down, must come down’

(43 words)

Littlebeut333 wants to ‘Change The World’…Ohhhh yes she does! ;)

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Advice fit for the Butt-hole? Or the Bee’s Knees of The Ball?

invocation 22, channel 7, deal 4, trick J; con...    I was going to write a short description about my views on changing the world…However, I know how quickly we humans dismiss opinion if it doesn’t fit with our own ideology and experiences… So I will just tell you some things about me, that I think may sway you into thinking I might have a point or two.

I am a 12-year-old pensioner. I vote Conservative, Green’s, Labour and BNP. I’m an Asian, White, Greek, Aborigine bar working prostitute, and also a director at British Telecom. In the evenings I read ‘The Times’ and I watch porn. I love the Dalai Lama, but also Jeremy Kyle and buying shares. I’m upper class, middle class, under class scum. I grew up in a palace with its own moat, situated on the back of a council housing estate; and I practice a mixture of Buddhism, Bettyism, and hard-core Eugenics. I don’t drink or smoke, and I only take crack on Tuesdays. I love champagne, especially when accompanied by Sainsbury’s basics’s tuna in brine. I’m a man, woman, trans-gender, bi sexual, straight geezer bird. I love grey parrots and baby baboons, but I campaign for the culling of all other wildlife in the name of commerce. I empty my chip pan fat down the sink.

(are you all covered and IN with me yet?) ;)

OK, now I’ve got your attention, I’ll tell you that I have been called ‘A wise old soul’ more than 3 times in my life! Read the rest of this entry

Take everything, Just leave the SHOES… for Betty’s Sake!

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Working slap bang in the middle of the city centre is depleting my tiny savings pot, at a ‘rapido’ rate

Why?

Shoes Shoes Shoes

I am obsessed, I have just purchased the cutest pair of shoes I think I’ve ever seen. Check ’em out, they’re called Gracie incase you wanna talk to them.

They remind me of Minnie Mouse and those black and white checked dresses from the 60’s

I’d go as far as to say they are orgasmic!

The trouble is, when I buy a pair of NEW SHOES 🙂 I wear them around the house, normally with my tracky bottoms or pyjamas; and I like to do this for at least 2 weeks after purchasing them

However, I have bought 4 pairs in the last 2 weeks (I have no self-control at the mo)…and I don’t know which one’s to gush over first

Ohhhhhh the problems!!!

All is well now (you can stop worrying ;))…I’m back, I’ve lined them all up in the lounge in front of me and I’m ‘twizling’ my foot, not just any foot, my foot.. Read the rest of this entry

Short Number 13 – It’s my alter ego, silly!

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“I’m not crying”

Water dropping from a tap.

Mrs Leaky, In all her glory!

   “Yes you are, you’ve been crying for days”

  

“It’s not me”

   “I have another personality you see”

   “Meet tap…Leaking tap”

“I’ll get you a new washer”

“Don’t bother, they all snap with the pressure, we don’t install them anymore”

(“This little tap of mine, i’m gonna let it cry, let it cry, let it cry, let it crrrrry”!)

(62 words) (woops)

Why use words, if you can ‘Ram Raid’ instead?

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What is the world coming to?

Last night, I was having a little session with Amy and my stereo for about half an hour, I’ll grant you it wasn’t on the quietest volume; but it wasn’t excessively loud! AND I respect the 11pm rule of silence… even though I live at opposite ends of the time continuum to the rest of the world, and screaming children at 7am; and arguments about who is gonna do the milk trip, are just as destructive to my sleep patterns, as music is past 11pm, for the normal people

It was approximately 7pm when a mini earthquake struck my lounge!

Being as I’m psychotic at the moment, it wasn’t the best phenomena for me to ponder over…I seriously thought I had morphed into a whole new land of new insanity, when everything began shaking. NOTE – I turned the music down immediately to investigate the drama

I have a little cupboard directly behind my TV stand which houses my electricity and gas meters. The newish neighbours next door who are too rude to say hello, began smashing some kind of heavy weapon against their side of my cupboard. I’m not sure what their weapon was but the door on the cupboard was forcing its way into the room, and pushing my television off the stand inch by inch with every blow. The glass shelf under the TV fell down, DVDs flew in every direction…and THEN a fucking great lump of concrete FLEW outta the cupboard and landed on my GLASS TV stand! Read the rest of this entry

Ten Line Tootys! Come play in ze hay ;) Writing Challenge 4 (2012)

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English: 'Art is Crap' - 35 x 60cm - digital p...

How Rude! 🙂

I’ve made up a game; as I’m 33 years old I’m gonna call it a writing challenge

Please come and play with me; word-pressers of the world

The Rules to each TEN LINE TOOTY

  1. Choose ten random sentences, from your last ten posts (1 from each)
  2. Put them together in date order (newest at the top) and then you have to make a coherent story out of them, with as few fill words as possible!
  3. Highlight the random sentences in your post

I will be the marker…I’m a very nice marker 😉 (I joke)

Play play yay?

Here’s my first shot at a TEN LINE TOOTY! (I’ll stick these on my Dawny’s mini seriessss page when I’ve stopped wallowing in mental health pity!)

The Start

The Third Meeting for NHS Service Users and Healthcare Professionals

The Agenda

1)      The discussion of the new ‘anti loon’ pills trial

2)      The current side effects of arthritic medication

3)      The Art donations for the month

Persons Present – Dr Hall, Dr Pratrowski (assisting Dr Hall). Services Users Annie; Brenda; Sarah; Amy; and Harry Read the rest of this entry

‘Psychosis is a necessity; for the emotional development of certain people’?(Moi, 2012)

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Love, Life and Feelings

I think it would be a fair generalisation to say that : – People who suffer from periods of psychosis, tend to be thinkers. Not just in bouts of insanity; but all the time…

I’ve just mind meandered onto this odd theory/definition of psychosis…

‘Psychosis is a necessity; for the emotional development of certain people’ 😉 (Moi, 2012)

Thinkers can fall into the trap of over thinking and under feeling. If you’re a thinker, you’re likely a problem solver… and before you know it, you’ve totally lost touch with your feelings because you’ve rationalised the shit out of; not feeling anything

But when delusions loom, in my experience…they are always intrinsically linked to 3 things

Fear/Terror

Shame

Pain

For me at least, these 3 categories cover everything that I choose not to dwell on as a thinker. Everything I don’t want to feel sits under these umbrellas… Read the rest of this entry

Finally, I cried…Not for me; not for us; but for you…

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End in Tears

I finally cried for you

Don’t misunderstand me; I’ve cried for us before… I cried buckets; and I’ve cried for me…but until that night, I didn’t really see how it was for you.

An innocent song led to a not so innocent song… and it was as though someone had knocked down a gargantuan damn, and the memories of you just drowned me

If I knew where you lived or where you were sleeping right then, I’d have got in the car and knocked your door down, just so I could hold you and tell you how sorry I was

How sorry I am

I didn’t think there were any feelings left. I say your name a lot still, but I had no idea all this weight was hiding inside, along with your name

In my head… I re-played one of the songs I wrote for you and every sweet thing that resides in your soul, came back for me all at once.

When you came into my life, I was broken and I wasn’t ready for you. I was so far off of ready I couldn’t see straight. But I also couldn’t fight it, I was obsessed with you and until a few weeks ago, I’d totally wiped that from my memory.

How, I don’t know Read the rest of this entry