Mr Rurch and Mr Shamone – The Destruction Derby of All Time!

I was talking to a friend last week about ‘morning stress’…

We covered the common pitfalls, such as :-

– Sleeping through the alarm clock

– Falling back to sleep and dreaming that you are getting ready for work

– Scraping the ice off of the car windscreen for 20 minutes

– Going to work with blobs of toothpaste all over your shirt

– Forgetting the important meeting on the day you look like shit on a stick

– Staying up all night raving, and going into work at 5am to make sandwiches a little too well oiled

But this little story surely trumps them all when it comes to –

The worst morning surprise ever!!!

I was working as a waitress (in a cocktail bar, when I met you)…Sorry, sidelined to the song there

Anyhoo…I had 20 minutes ’til I had to leave and I was watching a bit of morning TV and smoking a fag. To paint the scene properly, I’ll tell you that I live in a very small flat and from my spot on the sofa, I can see the hallway and the kitchen. My two cats were beating each other up in the hallway (nothing new there) and after a few stationary swipes, the running after each other began again in earnest, and they came tearing through the lounge and into the kitchen at around 50mph…(I kid you not, they sound like buffalo charging when they’re in full speed mode, and I think they come from a long line of Cheetah’s, as opposed to your standard moggy’s!)