After pondering on a vast number of words and deleting them all
I have just one thing to say
THANKYOU LIFE and ALL that reside in it :)!
(Or maybe 2 or 3 things it seems)
I’m not so thankful for my highly sensitive ‘bits’, but they are there for a reason…
I laughed A LOT last night and it was BLOODY MARVELLOUS!
I plan on doing as much of that as possible, as soon as possible, for as long as possible
Patience is a virtue!
Fear is a foooking nuisance
Hurt is a habit
Faith is a life saver
Once again…THANKS A MILLION 🙂
Love Dawny Xxx
“I’m not crying”
Mrs Leaky, In all her glory!
“Yes you are, you’ve been crying for days”
“It’s not me”
“I have another personality you see”
“Meet tap…Leaking tap”
“I’ll get you a new washer”
“Don’t bother, they all snap with the pressure, we don’t install them anymore”
(“This little tap of mine, i’m gonna let it cry, let it cry, let it cry, let it crrrrry”!)
(62 words) (woops)
I finally cried for you
Don’t misunderstand me; I’ve cried for us before… I cried buckets; and I’ve cried for me…but until that night, I didn’t really see how it was for you.
An innocent song led to a not so innocent song… and it was as though someone had knocked down a gargantuan damn, and the memories of you just drowned me
If I knew where you lived or where you were sleeping right then, I’d have got in the car and knocked your door down, just so I could hold you and tell you how sorry I was
How sorry I am
I didn’t think there were any feelings left. I say your name a lot still, but I had no idea all this weight was hiding inside, along with your name
In my head… I re-played one of the songs I wrote for you and every sweet thing that resides in your soul, came back for me all at once.
When you came into my life, I was broken and I wasn’t ready for you. I was so far off of ready I couldn’t see straight. But I also couldn’t fight it, I was obsessed with you and until a few weeks ago, I’d totally wiped that from my memory.
How, I don’t know Read the rest of this entry
This is the definition of osmosis : – The gradual, often unconscious, absorption of knowledge or ideas through continual exposure rather than deliberate learning
How bizarre that I didn’t know what it meant until today; but the phrase ‘osmosis psychosis’ has been playing in my head; in notes A and C respectively…for hours.
It is so bizarre being in this state. It’s not like the movies, I’m fully here; but I don’t see the same things as you do here. I’m not talking about visions and colours and dragons upon the walls
I’m talking a shift in perception to the reality we share
And then there are other realities; they vary in number and severity and mood each time. This time there are 4 others
They involve the flu jab for staff who are in on the plan; some kind of connection to the injection of cancer into patients through the innocuous guise of a necessary injection Read the rest of this entry
The very worst…of the human condition?
It’s just pain
You’ve lived it before
And you will, again
Now; you have no excuse for not doing everything you ever dreamed of
‘I said go out there and get hurt…And please don’t forget to enjoy the ride’
From the archives of my mind
Back in the days…
I was a naughty, rebellious, authority despising, horrible little child. So I figured (early in life), if I re-produced, it would be a bad move. I thought Ms Karma would send me a child, ten times naughtier. But because Ms Karma is clever, my avoidance of the pain of ‘owning a rebel’; was over-ridden! She simply gave me a ‘Rebel Ball’ instead; for this lesson…and probably also as some kind of justice for my poor Mother :0
My RED bouncing ball…Do you own one too?
For each emotion I have a WHITE ball, a really bouncy one, and note… it bounces vertically only. The top to bottom of a bounce, covers a fair distance but I’m adjusted to this, and some bounces are fabulous, which makes their EXTENT both a blessing and a curse. Read the rest of this entry
Beep Beep; you F****!"$ Beep
OK, today I had a mind meander onto anger, aggression and the queen of stifled anger, Ms Passivo Agressive-us. Here it is…
I was a rage filled teenager and we could argue all day over why I was angry; but only half of you would agree on these reasons as any sort of explanation
So I will just tell you that I was angry, pretty much all day, every-day, and I am not proud to say that I had many fights when I was young (younger sorry ;))
What is a bit strange is this…Even whilst I was fighting, I hated violence and I hated doing it, in the moment; and for all the damage I did with my feet, I was never able to punch anyone in the face.
Now, just seeing two people fight makes me feel physically sick!
But sometimes, I still do not have control. A few moths back, I was out drinking with my gals on a rare night out, we had just left this cool little pub that has a piano in it, and I busted out a dodgy rendition of ‘Yesterday’ on the untuned keys, we all sang, made a lot of noise, and ohhhhh we laughed and laughed. A bit like a scene from an old London pub from the ‘Hippy-Days’. It was a great night and I certainly wasn’t angry. Drink generally makes me tell people I love them until I fall asleep.
THEN Read the rest of this entry