Tag Archives: laughter

Erin Brockovich is my Hero…This deleted scene confirms it! ;)

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Film poster for Erin Brockovich (film) - Copyr...

Julia as Erin...

For anyone who doesn’t know about this amazing lady, this is how she became famous in a nutshell.

Without any legal training whatsoever, she kicked corporate ass to the tune of billions. Because the bastards at ze corporation, murdered thousands of people with their dirty poisonous vile chromium 6. She is a ‘ballsy’, american, deep south drooling, foul-mouthed angel; with more heart than Mother Theresa, and more ‘real life balls’ than Jack Nicholson’s ‘fake life balls’ in his role as Colonel Jessop in ‘A Few Good Men’…

Remember how scared you were the first time you heard him scream?

“I’m gonna rip your head off and piss in your dead skull Caffy, you fucked with the wrong marine”

Jack Nicholson in the famous “Here’s Johnny” scene

I, for one, was foooooooooking petrified. And she is more formidable than Jack…

The women in the office hate her, throughout the film/true life… they constantly club together and do their best to make her life a misery, whilst she ‘traps off’ periodically at them, for their cruel playground antics.

Her mouth is pretty controversial to say the least, and it’s not uncommon for her to be heard calling her boss a ‘fucking asshole’ every 5 seconds or so in the film/real life

So; that’s what you need to know to appreciate the joyous humour in this deleted scene 😉

I have just watched it for the first time and I’m roaring my ass off, and also sharing the love with you! Read the rest of this entry

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Confessions of a Blogger…’Ohhhh father forgive me?’

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Confession (film)

Forgive me father, for I have sinned...

I am responsible for at least 50 (or maybe even up to 57) hits; to my own page

I have voted for myself before, TWICE! The first vote was a ‘nudge’ styleee one ;). The 2nd is less confessional in style, because I have a bit of an OCD fetish with yellow, orange and red; they need to be in ratio/balance with my viewing tastes. And the screen needed some orange to soothe my anxiety (my lovely vote stars are orange; you can press on them to see the beauty if you like. I find 5 works best, visually of course ;))

I would like to UNCONFESS to liking my post entitled ‘It takes 7 seconds to fall in love, does it??!’ I was logged in a few weeks ago and I got one of them beautiful little orange notifications (god they excite me) and apparently, I (littlebeut333) had just read and liked my own post!

(Insert to WordPress…this is not helpful to my ‘blog cred’)

I DID like my own post about being a tree, and I shamelessly slapped myself on the bottom of it, in the ‘like’ area.

I have clicked LIKE on around 6-8 posts from other bloggers, after just skimming their work. Shocking, I know! Read the rest of this entry

‘Marketing of Self’ – Welcome to my Archives…

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I’ve just created a new page, and I’m shamelessly getting the news out there! In tut Bloggus-sphere.

A WHOLE PAGE dedicated to ‘Random Displays of my Past Articles of Bilge/Joy’ – You just click…That’s it!

Memory Lane…

Sometimes, I love nothing more than visiting one of the many blogs I frequent; and slowly scouring my way through its ‘back catalogues’. Hence why I’ve made this beautiful little page (in case you fancy a meander through mine)

A trip down ‘Memory Lane’ from…

Random Spillage’s from a Reportedly Strange Mind

JUST CLICK on the link below…Affectionately known as – ‘The Random Button of my Past Creations’…(except it’s not really a button, it’s a mildly unattractive text link instead; because widgets are a wonderful luxury of the home page only). Anyway, I’m sure you’ll manage, and I hope you enjoy the old and the new…

The crystal clear and/or the crappy tatt too….!

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/?random Read the rest of this entry

How I got a life-time reminder of my ‘Manic Ass Self’! ;)

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Shock-ed

Inflammation is that youuuuuu?

‘The Dangers of Tattoos and Bi polar’! 😉

OK, as it may be clear by the amount of random bilge I’ve been spilling of late…

I am a little bit ‘Manic’ at the moment!

I won’t attempt to explain the complexities of this little bugger of a phenomena as a whole; I’ll just touch upon this relevant symptom that it likes to create…

Flailing limbs!

Last week, I had a tattoo on my wrist, and I was chanting ‘sit still’ in my head the entire time. He had a good grip on my arm and I was kind of fixed into ‘still-nessssssss’, what with the general pain level around the ‘very important vein’s here’ area of me being stabbed with a needle.

I can tell you it’s not like having the belly done, no soft and squidgy shit sits on my bird like, ridiculous excuse for wrists! Read the rest of this entry

‘Happy 1st Birthday’ … Pretty Page of Bilge/Wisdom/Joy/Confusion &/or Inspiration

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I can’t quite believe how many spillages I’ve leaked already (Or perhaps I can)… My blog is a year old today! I promised my pretty page I’d so something to honour the occasion, and decided I’d pick a post from each month. It didn’t quite pan out like that; for many a reason.

Anyway, I ended up picking 13 posts; and in the random blog spirit, they encompass a selection of varied bilge. Each post has a little summary of why it made the ‘Grand 1st Anniversary’ line up. I hope you enjoy the re-cap, and I really hope you come back for a whole ‘nother year.

One last thing before I begin the un-veiling, I’d just like to say an enormous and humble ‘Thank-You’ to all my treasured visitors, new and old. You warm my cockles, ohhh you dooooo, that, you do…

I want to be a Tree

Tree Silhouettes

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/02/21/i-want-to-be-a-tree/

I chose this one because although I am a pooey and retired poet; I thought perhaps I should slam 1 in, for variety and nostalgia ;). This poem is what I imagine life to be like in a perfect avenue, full of lovely, wise, tree people. I don’t even necessarily want everyone to be a tree, just those people in the world who are most crappy; those people probably need to be trees more than anyone. But they won’t be trees.

Yet, other’s will.

Such is life.

Pretty please don’t take away my ‘Yellow Knees of Liberty’ 

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/03/15/pretty-please-dont-take-away-my-yellow-knees-of-liberty/

Hardly a literary prize winner. However, this post represents one of the most surreal nights of my life. I gained 6 points on my licence. I drove for 8 hours trying to reach the foooooooking 02 car park, so I could get on the tube from there, and continue the journey.

I thought I was gonna keel over, slumped onto the steering wheel, the stress was that immense!

English: Daewoo Matiz.

It was an important journey because reaching the destination was also, the only way to accertain just how loopy I was at the time. I lost 2 hub caps; peeeeeed in several inappropriate places in Central London; and at 5am I got out of the car to the 3rd copper ‘pulling me over’.

(Well; the 1st one didn’t pull me over; he wandered across to the driver’s side, after I nearly wiped him out of existence, kerb side! The curve crept up on me and I accidently half mounted the path at around 30mph; and I lost hub cap 1, right there)

Sorry, back to the 3rd copper

The buckle had indeed fell off of my belt; and, as I stood up to meet my maker from the Metropolitian Police Force, my jeans began to fall down!. He evicted me from London pronto; and issued a harsh warning about my narrow escape from a LIST of criminal charges. He ended the scene by asking me if I had a map? So I passed him the highly creased and stressed Atlas of Great Britain, circa 1988. He said ‘I don’t wnat it, I was asking if YOU had a map, for YOU”

If I went past the sign for Bow ONCE, which I can assure you I DID, I must of passed it 68 times! And my yellow/gold knees (aka Blanche), ended up stealing my liberty later anyway; by robbing me of £2000 in a year; fixing the beautiful little beast!

Beware the Daewoo Matiz…cute but costly, and akin to a pushchair; in terms of quality, build and road safety standards…

Thank You, Happy Birthday

When you

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/04/05/when-you/

I do believe I was…’Einstein like’ with my wisdom in this ‘ere post.

You wanted! – Census of The Mind 2011

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/04/27/you-wanted-census-of-the-mind-2011/

I chose this because I was born with anti-establishment DNA, and LORDY lord; I think my rant about the :-

“nosey, cheeky, exploitative, nosey, thieving, nosey, double standards, nosey, little pooey, “WHOOOOO do they think they are? Power crazy swindlers”

lasted 23.5 minutes. Passions fire…

Also, I had great dreams for this post

I imagined reams of snippets of people’s minds, flooding in like billio…reality then hit; and although the comments were somewhat thinner on the ground; they weren’t remotely thin in quality. This is my blogs version of a very cool time capsule of the mind. And the mind is my favourite thing; except for maybe kisses and laughing!

Life is A Stage and we are the Actors, Go learn your lines ‘Chameleon’s’

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/05/28/life-is-a-stage-and-we-are-the-actors-go-learn-your-lines-chameleons/

When I started blogging, I had a dream 😉 My blog had a dream and Deena fulfilled it, for details please see her comment below the post.

Thank-you again…

Pelican 0 14 02.1350 3

As well as being the stuff of dreams for my pretty page and me toooo…

When I learnt this information from Goffman; it literally changed my life instantly! I was compelled to share the love…I think my jaw stayed on the floor for a week; and I spent 7 of the quietest days of my life; watching everyone; me dumbfounded; muttering

“Fuck me Goffman, you have just explained life in its entirety to me, and sent me out into the world with new eyes; they are seeing far more, than they did before.”

“Where are you? I’m not sure what to do with all this right information right now but…”

(Ohhhh let me/us ALL experiment…in ‘Deviating from the Script’)

Trust ‘The Goff’, the elite are always as uncomfortable with my altered script; as the nation was when Nick Griffin appeared on ‘Question Time’! Dum Dum Duuuuuuuum! And THEN, he said people of all skin colours were welcome in his vision for the nation!

Nick…

Here’s a flicked V for you; from my naughty rude page; not me; my page

Don’t put me on the ‘possible up riser’ list please

Oh it’s OK Nick, it was a peace sign! Sorry, it’s dark in here

Mothers, the Invisible Vilified Heroes of Humanity

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/05/03/mothers-the-invisible-vilified-heroes-of-humanity/

English: Breastfeeding the baby.

Literally, I still cannot imagine anything more testing, difficult, thank-less, tiring, scary, selfless and ‘freedom quashing’ than motherhood. The older I get, the more I am in awe and amazement at the sacrifice women make every day, invisibaly bringing their kids up, right in front of our blind eyes.

I find it really sad that the care and love they give, is worth so little in our culture. I know not every-one is lucky enough to have an amazing mum, but my mum is the most fabulous gem on Gods Green Earth. She has given up everything for us; and my sister has done the same for her ‘Pops’.

I also chose this because my mum proudly sends it to everyone she knows (bless her), and she got all teary eyed when she read it. Which is nowt new as she is a bit of a weeper; but still, it was a special moment. And a rare opportunity to give her something back. Mothers Everywhere, I think you are just amazing.

Blood, Sweat (a little wee wee) and Tears of Laughter!

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/06/17/blood-sweat-a-little-wee-wee-and-tears-of-laughter/

English: the beixo compact-7 folding bike in a...

It needs no further explanation past the title really; without doubt; one of the funniest experiences and viewings of my life. My entire massive family, know about Trent and her mind blowing accident on ‘The Hawk’. This never fails to make me laugh and I love reading it because; I just emptied the memory onto the page. Sometimes I re-live it here, I can absorb it’s moment without any effort from the re-call section of my brain

Lil Trissus, stay off the roads FOREVER pleeeeease

Revenge is a ‘reflex action’, This is why we are Screwed ‘til further notice

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/07/28/revenge-is-a-reflex-action-this-is-why-were-screwed-til-further-notice/

English: Carving Knife Photographer: (L. B. Eh...

This was a bit of a learning curve in the making. Like all posts it began with a random thought and as I began writing, I realised I’d been ‘bitch slapped’ by fate, in order to grow past revenge. I had more experience in the field, than first thought!

And if anyone reads this, and finds themselves in the kind of deluded space I lived in (I’m still deluded, just differently now), feeling hurt all the time, and miserable. I hope this post shows them that maybe, just maybe, the way they are seeing things is not the way things are actually happening

It’s a tricky old path and the trouble with revenge is; when you decide to take it upon yourself to even the score. You are choosing to inflict pain or suffering on someone else, and if you believe in Karma even slightly, you need to see what you’re creating; all that pain is coming back your way. So really, it’s an exhausting no-brainer on all levels; It was a long and winding road, with plenty of side stepping! I can’t recommend the journey enough really.

Lived, Loved and Lost

Love Letters (Julie London album)

Anyone around in the early days of ze blog; may have read all about our great ‘Love’. Both our ‘rise and fall’ (and middle come to think of it) were touched upon here countless times; from an outside view, maybe a tad excessively? But the posts were nothing in quantity; not compared to the abundance of everything I had… when love lived here for a wee while.

For the first time in my life, I lived, loved and lost like a proper grown up.

He was such a big part of my life in this 1st year of Random Spillages, I can;’t comfortably leave this love off of the list, and I didn’t fancy re-reading posts from our ‘rise’

So you’re getting an entry from ‘Morose Town’. An extract from our ‘fall’

You could always visit the love category on my page if you’re interested in our rising love. I’ve been so busy being rageous, I didn’t really notice I’d calmed down. A bit of reflection later and; if he was ever to read this; I’d want him to know that I thank him, for everything…

The Circle of life rolls round AGAIN

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2012/02/09/the-circle-of-life-rolls-round-again/

London Capsule

I like this post. It was a rare moment in my life when I felt proud of myself, and also, like I wanted to stand on my own throat for killing my Ukulele. But the philosophical little lamb within, loved this experience.

Because the subsequent ‘creating and destroying’ thought that followed, was a perfect match.

Also, I doooooo laugh at the picture of the foot (and as I am known for roaring at my own jokes sometimes)… I’ll admit I am tickled everytime I see

‘Not my foot, just a foot’.

I don’t know why it tickles me so greatly, but it does. Small minds and all that…

Ohhhhh Alby, Trust you to Nab the 100th Post position

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2012/02/01/ohhhh-alby-trust-you-to-nab-the-100th-post-position/

English: Stella Artois sign

My amazing old step dad is cashing in on the fame list again. Ohhhhh Alby, first you steal my 100thy post position, and now you’re in my anniversary list on my blogs birthday!

Writing this was such a joy, and me and Trissus roared at all the memories for hours.

Now for the spooky bit!

The most memorable of his phrases, by far, was, “Can you see me, can you see me now?” And bugger me, as I was pressing the PUBLISH button on his post, an advert came on the TV for a film, and anyone who knows me will vouch for the fact that I am incapable of tuning into adverts. INCAPABLE! I see one a year, tops. But this loud (as they always are) trailer came on; and this guy stood in the middle of the screen and shouted right at me… ‘Can you see me?’

It freaked me right out

Oh and then there was a film on friday night, I think it was actually some sort of :- ‘Renegade the Movie’! Stop haunting me and nicking my baking trays you bugger! Love you

Cat Love, far more than one might think

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2011/09/15/cat-love-far-more-than-one-might-think/

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A philosophical and humuorous lesson for us all in here I think,

And an ODE to my baby boys. I would be truly lost without Mr Shamone and Mr Rurch… and their Rhino styleeee head butts of devastation. They are still the ‘lights of my life’

English: Black and white cat with blue eyes

Forver Loved, Never Forgotten, Miss Amy Winehouse

English: Amy Winehouse at the Eurockéennes of 2007

Amy Amy Amy – Still the ‘Love of my Life’. I don’t feel that any poxy peeeeedly paragraph could ever do her justice, so I will pop the link here of some of her visual beauty… and shut up.

https://littlebeut333.wordpress.com/2012/02/01/forever-loved-never-forgotten-miss-amy-winehouse/

And there you have it, a few of the Random Spillages from this Reportedly Strange Mind. All of which are a little bit special, in my eyes anyway…

Dawny Xxx

‘Oooooo Monday’…Sneaking up and being all Amazing to me! Are you OK?

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Jesusin Ka Ryst!!

First Monday

Monday? Is That Youuuuu?

It is Monday

And

It has been FABULOUS!

This does not happen to me, I swear I actually have DNA strands that can’t handle them, it’s intrinsic, statutory Dawny, and as regular as pooing is to flies. I have the Ump pretty much every Monday

I awoke from a not so marvellous sleep, however, my lovely sister had been to buy bacon and crusty rolls, which was a really pleasant surprise

Then the lovely lady from the housing association came round cos I’m getting a brand new kitchen :), and the chick turned up with a little mini mobile walking B&Q styleeeee set of displays. I discovered I am getting a most marvellous kitchen and I would like to thank the gods of Pan Handles, because now it is illegal to have them against a wall (cos we cannot safely move handles to the side anymore). So yay for the health and safety police, I’m even getting a posh tap. Read the rest of this entry

‘The Ten Commandments’ (Littlebeut Styleeeee)

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In response to the request from the author of this marvellous piece…’My Ten Commandments’ ( visit novembrepleut.worpress.com for a read ). Here is my far crappier version of the new age ‘Ten Commandments’ Dawny Styleeeeee…

Thou Shalt Not (album)

Up for a new testament anyone?

1 – Thou shalt notice the free and limitless pleasure that comes with needing to eat to survive, every time thou puts something delightful in thou mouth

2 – Thou shalt learn everything thy/thou can, about everything thy’s need to, and thou shalt keep learning or face the wrath of the disciple, ‘Ignoramus Monstrosotus’

3 – Thou shalt be nice, no acting like your nice and being a little beast on the quiet, thy queen of crappy blogging will know, and she is worse than the disciple ‘Ignoramus Monstrosotus’

4 – Thou shalt love thy family and friends, even if thou relatives are bilious and thy friends are blindingly boring

(I know not what I am doing with theses thou’s and thy’s, as you may have noticed!)

Read the rest of this entry

“Ohhhh Alby” (Trust you to nab the 100th post position ;))

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To my dear, slightly odd old Step Dad, who I remember with mixed feelings, but mostly, a lot of laughter and a lot of love…
English: The Music Man(r) logo depicting The M...

Image via Wikipedia

Happy Birthday Alby! I wondered why I had been thinking about you soooo much these last few days; and then I saw the date and smiled. I still miss you and we talk about you often. I hope you continue to sleep soundly Treasure, and here is a gift list for you to read from heaven, of some of your classic moments…

The screaming of ‘Trent’, and the laughter of the rest of our giant household…When you put the green bits off the tomatoes in Theresa’s bed, and she thought a plague of spiders had infested her mattress!

The party where you were so smashed, you thought you owned a Rhodesian ridgeback, the beast was apparently in the bedroom, though none of us had ever seen this horse! 😉

When your mate stacked it, and his entire torso flew through the new fence, much to Mums dismay and horror, but OMG did we chuckle??? It was epic and unexpected!

To Trent -Testing the blind spots for her safety (Bless) – “Can you see me, Can you see me now?” Read the rest of this entry

An Odd Pictorial Illustration of a Random Mind Trail…”Good Stuff”

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Just a Quick Point on – My Moral Degradation! ;)

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Lion Man SmallBlockExpo06 10

Image by Mouse via Flickr

I am a moral sewer rat after all!

If I was ever going to be seduced into marrying anyone, for anything other than love, I’ve just realised I’d have an answer!

I’m ashamed to say my price is ‘The Lion Man’!

Hanging around with him all day just blows all my previous beliefs about my being for sale, firmly outta the water!

If you don’t know who he is, he is Channel 5’s only redeeming feature (except for The European Blue Review from back in the day) Read the rest of this entry

National Express Thought spillage 2

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English: The face of a black windup alarm clock

Image via Wikipedia

I am not known for my ability to make travel connections. Usually because I fall asleep in airport lounges and train stations! I’ve tried getting my friends and family to call at the appropriate ‘please save my ass’ times, but the ringing of a mere mobile phone does not wake this beast and my poor Mother sweats and worries as she awaits the call, giving her:-

The new destination

The new ETA

And at times requesting she send official documentation to Embassies! Read the rest of this entry

Never under-estimate the Joy that can be found in “Sickness”

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helping sarah

Image by kat st kat via Flickr

Writing this actually proper hurt my brain. I had to think so hard to get this bloody lot out! I can’t bear scrolling down it one more time, so here it comes…

The deeply embedded idea that both science and medicine provide us with solid facts about disease and the physical world, is BULL CRAP!

When push comes to shove, for every truth you buy into, someone else will have been busy dis-believing it and proving it too. Evidence has officially never been so useless…

Or sought after

;///

And we are told to believe experts! Well if they can’t make their bleeding minds up about what causes the a) and what thing solves the b) and where oh where c) really did come from. Why would we believe any of them?

Knowledge is learning everything about something; and knowing that nothing you’re learning is fact, more an insight into someone else’s surety around one ambiguous idea/topic. Read the rest of this entry

Lil’ Trissus and her ‘Dramatic Entrances’ at Dawnys!

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My dear old sister continues to bring me the deepest belly chuckles in literally, the shittiest of times…

Varying between ‘every few hours’ to ‘every few months’; she arrives at my door in some kinda crisis or another,

Well yesterday was one of them days, and the crisis is shit and sad on a profound level 😦

But her appearance at points is just tooooo funny, so even in the heightened throes of profound pain; we often end up ‘roaring’ through the tears at the ‘state of her’.

Bear in mind she walks past normal people on the way to mine 😉 Read the rest of this entry

‘Blood, Sweat (a little wee-wee) and Tears’…of Laughter! :)

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Travel Bike

The Hawk Courier!

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the machine that is ‘The Hawk Courier’, it is a highly attractive ‘fold up’ bike from the ‘80’s’. You know the ones with a tiny teeny strange shaped frame (to allow it to fold up like a pushchair!), and wheels with a diameter of around 8 inches. ;0… it had a strangely ‘low-set’ seat. And though it paraded as an adults bike, whether you were 4’9” or 6’3”…when seen riding one, you looked like you’d borrowed it off your 5-year-old 😉

Mum’s particular little beauty was fashioned in a vibrant blue and proudly emblazoned across its main (teeny tiny) middle bar, in gold, was ‘The Hawk Courier’!! Read the rest of this entry