Tag Archives: life

I Will Be Your Eyes Until You Can ‘See’ Everything…

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They sat in English class together, paying no attention to the teachers speech, nor to ‘Of Mice and Men’. They were gassing like their lives depended on it!

“What is blue like?” she askedblind

“Blue is running as fast as you can into the waves, it is diving head first into the rushing sea. Blue is freezing cold lips that come from a night out in the snow, or from sucking an ice lolly hard and fast.”

“White?”

“White is the colour of innocence. White is unusual, as it holds all the other colours within it, yet it is almost colorless in appearance. White is a newly fitted, pristine kitchen with a fridge, freezer, washing machine and dishwasher. White is cotton wool, and the grainy texture of the chalk they use for writing on a blackboard”

“Red? What is red like?”

“Red is a boiling hot camp fire on a winter’s night. Red is the colour of passion and of angst. Red is a racy looking lady on a saturday night up town. Red is all lips and kisses. Water is see through and blood is red. When you feel the slight thickness of blood against water, you feel red”

“What are you like?” she asked…smiling

“When I’m being categorised according to my skin colour, I am white, but not like the white I described. I am actually a peachy pinky beige if we’re gonna get a little detailed about it :)” Read the rest of this entry

Dear Stranger…

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Dear Stranger,

I may tell you my name, I will more than likely tell you about some of the ‘tragic comedic experiences’ of my life. I will tell you about the places I’ve lived and the jobs I’ve had. I’ll (maybe) tell you a little about my brain. I may even tell you about one or two of the people I’ve loved. But, dear stranger, I will never tell you this…stranger

One day I had my heart-broken, in the most dazzlingly extreme, life shattering way that a heart can be broken. I won’t tell you what happened after either, because you wouldn’t believe it…I survived. Just. I really don’t wanna tell you the next thing.

I will never give anyone my heart again. Read the rest of this entry

‘Blessing My Blessings’…From Facts To Feeling,

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In the quest to cheer the fooook up before I keel over….I have, on numerous occasions, written lists of all my blessings and I have to say; I’m lucky to have a pretty long list. However, I don’t think a name/one word summary does many favours to covey the richness and depth of goodness, that some of the people and things on my list, bring to my life.

BlessingsThe trouble with lists :- When I read the list back to myself, I can’t help but feel like, the act of blessing the blessings’  (giving them the level of appreciation they deserve and hold), gets minimized and becomes almost mechanical. FEELING gratitude rather than NOTING gratitude, make for 2 very different states of mind

Sooooo, ramble ramble, the long and short of it is – I am going to try to capture the essence of the people and circumstances on my list, one at a time…I am going to savour slowly, all that I have, by really digging down into each separate person or place, noting their qualities, our experiences, our memories, and anything else that I associate with the people on my list

Read the rest of this entry

A Hearbreaking Choice, A Second Chance, A Mothers Letters of Love

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To my darling daughter… the light of my life and my reason for living! Time has dragged so slowly since I wrote to you last month, I’ve been counting down the days til I could again. I really hope school is still being good to you 🙂 You told me a little bit about your friend Alice in your last letter, she sounds like a great friend! I’d love to hear about your other friends when you next write to me. 

So… has school taught you anything yet that really impressed you? God! As usual, I wanna ask you so much, but also tell you so much…

I want you to know that you can ask or tell me anything, absolutely anything. I’m not only your birth mother, I’m your best friend too. If you can’t go to your parents about something, no matter how wrong or scary or private it feels, you can tell me. I am impossible to shock so when I say anything, I really mean anything 🙂

Anyways, my little spring chicken, guess what!! ?? Thanks to your parents ongoing kindness, we get to see each other in less than 4 months! A  whole day together baby, I’m soooooo looking forward to it. What do you want to do? Where shall we go? I can’t believe your back in my life!!! I feel so blessed and I’m eternally grateful to your parents for this chance to get to know you…my darling daughter

I’ve been thinking like a wild thing about this months topic! I always start by asking myself ‘What do I want my baby girl to know and be?’ After sifting through boys, motherhood, hugs, racism and a ton of other topics, I finally landed on respect. I can only hope that I explain it in a way that makes sense Read the rest of this entry

I’ll have a Diet Coke and a Dose of Leprosy (Please) :)

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Hey all you folks on the tinternet!

I have written just 3 or 4 posts in 6 whole months! I’ve missed it a lot, and I’ve noticed that the more often I write, the better I feel. Plus, I still have a weak spot for them orange stars on wordpress…they give me a mini lift ;). I was writing almost everyday for 1 or 2 years before this gargantuan hiatus hit me. I was so self-conscious (whole ‘nother story). I think the creative section of my brain went AWOL

Ideas flowed in and out of me…normallydrunk

I was always thinking, always linking the ‘facts of life’!!! together to illustrate how the puzzle is made real… because of our inter connected lives, in terms of experiences, thoughts and feelings, schooling, families, institutions, careers, friends and lovers etc. Our similarities are wide-reaching, and bigger (more meaningful) than our differences. I truly believe that…

Anyways!!!

This post was meant to just be about alcohol, so I’ll get on the topic right about now Read the rest of this entry

Medicated Memories…I’m Everything Without Contents!

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I’m angry without the anger

I care with flatlined clichéd pity

Without others I could slip by, abandoned

What is a soul without memories

***

In solace I know I’ve been stolen

Repressing all that makes me

Pushing away my spirited version of chatter

Sitting firmly on top of rusty springs

Bearing heavy….Heavy on the heart

*** Read the rest of this entry

Don’t Worry…I’ll Google It! (Pet Peeeev’s)

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phoneMy ‘pet peeeev’ of the year so far has gotta be that bloody phrase we so often hear nowadays

“I’ll google it”

And that’s it for the next 20 minutes …you can kiss goodbye to any old school methods of communication (talking); whilst whoever has a smart phone insists that you snuggle into each others personal space to share the 3 inch screen, all for some crappy and very miniature video or webpage that proclaims to know the answer to everything

Not to mention the meandering onto the other phrase

“Just wait for it to load, it’s hilarious/clever/entertaining”

I really don’t like smart phones…They facilitate rudeness and increase irritation in living rooms all over the land

That is all for now…

Leave Everything, Leave Nothing? Leave History or Hell!

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IMAGINE…

The world was coming to an end

Were all given a time capsule, inside it is an a4 piece of paper and it readstime 1

As we all know, we are coming to the end of the world and there is nothing we can do to stop it now. However, we believe these capsules may survive the chemical explosion. One day a long long way in the future, someone may find yours. You have 200 words at your disposal

Think of all the languages we have, great teachings, beautiful works of art. The internet, books, movies, bibles, history…All gone Read the rest of this entry

When Insanity, Faith, Welfare, Ignorance and Bullying Collide…We call it Society!!!

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Insanity often brings with it, a deep and profound understanding of human nature and all its oddities…Unfortunately, the semi-sane sometimes lack the skills needed to understand other humans, but they try anyway

No-body is ever going to convince me that my friends and family are anything other than ‘fabulous and dedicated’…Paranoia came far later than their ‘wunderbar’ love.whats

I also think your friends and family are ‘fabulous and dedicated’ … Most people are

Read the rest of this entry

If I was a Car!

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I would be too big at the backcar

I would have inconsistent and inexplicable oil needs

Prone to breakdowns during short haul journeys

My battery would be flat often, for no fathomable reason

Every MOT would be filled with never before seen malfunctions

I would accelerate prematurely (formula one styleeee) with ba mere tap on the gas pedal Read the rest of this entry

A Great Philosopher Once Wrote…A Poem

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poetA poem begins with a painful emotion

Always and Forever

A poem tells a story, but the words present themselves a new in prose

Always and Forever

A poet is a soul who is torn and lost

Always and Forever

Poetry adds invisibility and ambiguity to every word chosen

Always and Forever

A poem is inspired by two things…regret or pain

Always and Forever Read the rest of this entry

My Vision for Improving Mental Health for Patients and Professionals Alike…

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I would be extrememly grateful for any opinions you have on this dear readers, as I want to take this to my NHS trust in the hope some of the ideas and viewpoints are viable… the goal being to improve service to patients, and to give professionals more confidence and room to utilise their unique ways of caring, leading to a higher sense of satisfaction for all involved.

Its a bit messy and not the finished draft, but pre-tweek, i’d soooooooo appreciate your views if you have some time to read it. Danke Danke 🙂

The number’s for the numbered points have disappeared in the copy and paste transfer…as have all the references! I’m sure we all know why, anyhoo, the main bones are here!

Good Doctors are never forgotten. Good practice changes lives. Poor practice can destroy them. 

   Anxiety, Mental Illness & Ethics for Change

 

Guidance to Treat Anxiety alongside other Mental Health Issues – For Primary & Secondary Care Workers

1.       The True Scale of Anxiety in ‘Mentally Ill Patients’

2.       Anxiety Kills!

3.       A Safe Place is Vital…

4.       The Things We All Feel When Were Mentally Unwell

5.       Simplify and Believe. When Will The Culture of Distrust Dissolve?

6.       The Questionnaire

7.       6 Ways to Nurture Hope…

8.       6 Things We Will Do For You (Immediately)

9.       6 Weeks Alone – Mind The Gap

10.   6 Steps to Great Care – Back to Basics…

11.  No More Double Standards – Say Goodbye To Stigma

 Guidance to Treat Anxiety alongside other Mental Health Issues – For Secondary Care Worker Read the rest of this entry

How to Change The World Forever! Press Print from The Armchair! :)

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The Day ‘Newling’ Changed The World – Dum Dum Duuuummmmmmmmm!

(click here to visit ‘the future’)money new 2

BRISTOL are the latest forward thinkers on ‘Printing their own currency’ (see link below) – With a little SIMPLIFICATION, One currency could be rolled out worldwide with relative ease

Please bear in mind that if you take away stock markets (which are just game playing with numbers on a large-scale) and also, erase the (IDEA) man-made invention called ‘THE ECONOMY’ – Money is worth the cost of the paper and the ink. TOTAL! The whole world trade system and the linking of currencies – are otherwise known as the 2 methods used to maintain the current (corrupted) way of doing things…FOREVER!

SIMPLIFIED Solution – Design and Print Money at home (The rich make up about 2% of the population). The other 98% are normal people, and most normal people live on or below the bread line. For success, the new money ‘goes live’ when most of the 98% know about it. It needs nationwide (and hopefully worldwide) uptake…making it clear to the rich and powerful, that they are seriously outnumbered (as the rich will resist, but only for so long)money newling

98% of the world population are broke! And 98% have the power to change their lives for the better FOREVER!

‘WAGES in Newling’ – I’m happy to set the bank/building society up, and if employers refuse to pay wages in ‘Newling’, I’ll print you off all the ‘Newling’ you need, until the 2% come round to the idea that they can’t win this one. Then Tesco will be giving you your change in ‘Newlings’ 🙂 Read the rest of this entry

I Want To Be A Tree!

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From seed to enlightment, I hope we’ll all be trees

English: tree                            A lifetimes worth of avenues, littered with coloured leaves

All that we do, make our rings

               All that we learn ring the rings, we get wider, sturdier

as our essence find solid Read the rest of this entry

The 333’s of 2013 – Borderlines, Love, Help of Hope, Therapy for a Life :)

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The 7th story in my little writing challenge for 2013. Each line must begin with a word that starts with the same letter as the last word on the line before it. 3 words in a line, 33 lines in ze story…

WHY? Cos I LOVE the number 3 🙂

……….

It’s been yearsseven 1

Years? How many?

Millions, or seven

So I re-touched

Reading your sheets

So much advice

All so relevant

Rivers away then

Theory, fantasy, wishfulseven 2

We did it!!!

I’m confused..What?

We fixed some

Simply by trying

Test me please!

Paul said NO Read the rest of this entry

Mergence of Sarcasm and Magnificence = ‘Life’s Heady Heights’ @ Dawny’s

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SUCCESS is wholly subjective goals 4

When the theme tune for Jeremy Kyle tickles my ear drums, the rush of ‘feel good chemicals’ go wild in the aisles of my brain…and it is in joyful moments like these, when I feel most successful 🙂goals 2

When Meredith’s mother told her to be extraordinary; she didn’t mean an extraordinary surgeon, she meant an extraordinary person!

I wrote the following, when I had the ‘royal hump’ and it’s rather sarcastic and self (+ existence) deprecating! (AND also, sadly true :))

I decided this year was gonna be theeeee year of my life! (After year 33 went a little ‘tits up’ to say the least) Read the rest of this entry

Oh What a Night! :0…

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After pondering on a vast number of words and deleting them all

I have just one thing to say

THANKYOU LIFE and ALL that reside in it :)!

(Or maybe 2 or 3 things it seems)

I’m not so thankful for my highly sensitive ‘bits’, but they are there for a reason…

I laughed A LOT last night and it was BLOODY MARVELLOUS!

I plan on doing as much of that as possible, as soon as possible, for as long as possible

Patience is a virtue!

Fear is a foooking nuisance

Hurt is a habit

Faith is a life saver

Once again…THANKS A MILLION 🙂

Love Dawny Xxx

All the 333’s of 2013 – When Hate became History – The Last 2 Enemies

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The 5th story in my little writing challenge for 2013. Each line must begin with a word that stenemiesarts with the same letter as the last word on the line before it. 3 words in a line, 33 lines in ze story…

Life long enemies

Everybody knew it

Intuition. Stomachs knotted

Knowledge imbued viewers

Vicariously, they hated

Habitually people watched

Wanting a fight

Feigning concern or

Offering new ideas

—-

In the future

Fostering did work Read the rest of this entry

Never too Old or too Happy to make a DEN! :)

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Just this morning, I was feeling in need of a little of life’s magiccat quilt

Like many other mornings, Mr Rurch (one of my two AMAZING pussy cats) joined in the fun of playing ‘den’

I don’t like to place undue pressure on myself during these times, so our den making was limited by me and the chair. It’s not a complicated process with this in mind 😉

Basically, it’s me in the armchair, with my arms raised and acting as mini stilts, with the quilt surrounding me, leaning on the very top/back of the chair and ending on the floor…Then I make a little entrance hole in the quilt and I say the magic words

Actually, I whisper to him as this seems to give him endless joy 🙂

‘Mr Rurch…Come get in the den’

Then I like to close the hole off and pull the quilt tight so he can’t get in! 🙂 He then mounts the slope that forms around my quilt covered stilt arms and scratches and screams trying to get access. Once I’vecats quilt rinsed that section of all the available entertainment, I re-open the entrance and he crawls down with his eyes out on door stops…I have to hold the quilt up a little bit, so that he can get on my lap without being plunged into complete darkness

He loves it (WE love it)

Read the rest of this entry