This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine, let it shine, let it shine, let it shine...
What becomes of the broken-hearted?
So many people describe their 1st love as unique; millions stand by the idea that there is no love like it…nothing comes near to your 1st love right?
It took me years to get over my 1st love; so I get the roots of this thinking, I do.
But I don’t think it’s for the reasons we think…
Is it the love that’s unique?
Or just the experience?
When we have our heart broken for the very 1st time, it is NEW and immensely painful. And we just don’t know how to deal with it. We feel shock; immense grief; confusion; depression and helplessness. We are overwhelmed, empty, and without any skills from past experience to even compare it to. Many of us revert back to infantile ways, to cope with the pain, because we don’t know any other way…
Please take a meander with me, onto my friend who is a ‘Soldier’ Read the rest of this entry
We were destined to meet whether you like it or not; but what you do with us now is entirely up to you. I have laid myself bare, my limitations and my overt desire for you are on the table. Are you gonna flip it like you normally do? Or are you gonna try and pull the tablecloth off again? I hope not because you are shit at it! And the crockery savings pot is ebbing away by the day
My ancestors laid lines! Lines!
But they were off course and missed the boat. Granddad always missed the boat, mainly cos of the pretty girl standing next to him at the ticket office! Little Casinova that he was!
The boat set sail from the port for the 20th time, but again, we missed each other…
Then there was war, I woke up determined to walk a million miles to your roots, but when I pulled the curtains back I saw the horror, the little girl from next door was; well she was…in pieces and her hand was lying on my doorstep when I opened the door to leave! Read the rest of this entry
The Love Letter
I wish I was her, just as much as you long to be him.
I try not to read it, but the temptation is often too great when I see it next to me on the telephone table,
I knew one day it would finally be there
And that it would say everything I ever wanted to hear…
But I still find it strange that you never wrote my name on it
To be her in your eyes, I would have to be so much more than I am. As much as the fantasist in me wants your tale as my existence; even if I had enough wonderful inside me to be half the woman she was, I just coudn’t fight to fix that piece of me…
Because, oh I’m so sorry, it’s because
I know that it will never make me happy,
There is every reason why it should; it completes most, but most I am not. Why does it destroy me with such ferocity? I can only guess that it is a poison to my destiny…
Read the rest of this entry
Reg and his sweaty roll up; are waiting for youuuuuu!!!
However many items come through the letterbox today, they all count as cards, so DO tell your friends you got 2-7 cards. (With today’s junk mail levels, you’re pretty much guaranteed 2, minimum)
DO NOT shave your legs and if possible, you will have abstained from shaving for long enough to tong your leg hairs into beautiful ringlets!
DO eat something enormously calorific, I’m gonna slam an Indian for 2 whole people, right down me.
DO fondly remember all the past Valentines that you spent with your ex’s, with a symbolic flick of the V’s!
DO spend at least £23 on yourself today; because if you were one of the unlucky few that left it until 6pm on the 13th to buy your other half a card, that is how much you would have paid for said card in Clinton’s!!! (Daylight bastard robbery)
Send everyone you love a text, your mum, smelly grand-dads, best friends, your great uncle twice removed if you’re struggling for contacts (they won’t reply cos they are having sex, but you will have to take note of the abundance of love you have in your life) Read the rest of this entry
What a classic shot for drunken chuckles! 🙂
Well well well
I am drunk (thank fooook for spell check) and I am writing. I do believe this is a new experience in the life cycle of Dawny
Some addled thoughts…
My cat’s rock
I have several holes in my hand because I constructed 8 8 8 pieces of flat pack furniture and I BROKE the ROLSON screwdriver, 3 items in
My mum said, no offence darling but crazy people often have large amounts of strength
I love reading
I hate them pooey flies, called attic flies, they creep into the walls in the summer as tiny creepy puuupee shit, and then come and invade the house later, flying around all busted up; and landing their massive selves on me and my hands, with their vile and lengthy old legs.
They can’t reproduce and they are the fly version of 98 year old humans with cancer and dementia. And they disgustingly disintegrate over everything Read the rest of this entry
She's the flowers, the wind and spring...
My boss has requested a review on a song, from a personal stand point. I have chosen to write about
Almaz by Randy Crawford
It’s strange listening to it with purposeful but analytical ears. Naming the pieces of the journey that it takes me on has been really quite moving, so thank you for the request…
I absolutely adore the piano, and this song is also one of my Mum’s all time favourites,
She would play it every Saturday full blast and I remember so clearly her passion when she sang along, with a voice almost as beautiful.
I see now that the warmth of it comes largely with the association with my Mum. When she sings she is most free, and I would watch her disappear until she was totally inside the song, her small release from the outside she had to endure.
The first 8 bars of that piano take me back to the feelings of Saturday mornings. The security of the chaos that ensued as the 3 of us played up while Mum pulled out the chairs, and asked us to lift up our feet so she could get the Hoover in the gap; then I remembered how ‘ickle’ I was; and that it was ages before I was included in the ‘lift your feet up club’
The piano and the warm security, if I close my eyes, it takes just 4 bars and I am back there
And then I am taken to school, trumpet lessons with my unforgettable music teacher. Read the rest of this entry
They say ‘True Love’ lasts a lifetime, and I know this not to be true, per se.
Some ‘true loves’ last for a period of our lifetime; and maybe these could still be defined loosely as a lifetime; because as we come to the end of them, sometimes we’ve changed so much, and the love has turned into something else, something lesser. This kind of ending can close a whole lifetime’s worth of chapters. And in moving on, it kind of feels like you are indeed, starting out again. Back in Nappies and crying for a dummy, some calpol and warm miiilllllk!
So maybe there are ‘true loves’ that last a (mini/maxi/period/chapter) lifetime, maybe they do count too, or maybe not…
But some ‘true loves’, well I think they must last a whole lifetime…22 years is a long time thus far. Read the rest of this entry
Image by .Andi. via Flickr
A glass of repetition with some ice please,
A coolant for the burning in my chest,
How many different ways can I say the same thing,
I speak my words, I can’t fathom how you function,
I am sickened by your reactions,
Pained and broken by your words, but mostly, from exposure to your thoughts,
I see inside you when you speak at peak, and the truth has rocked my world,
All I asked was be there in the rough times,
You played it really well when they were bumpy but well peppered with divine,
Your soul is well intended but you are blind,
Now I see the you behind the mask.. A mask I knew existed some time ago,
I waited and prepared for the viewing but…
Read the rest of this entry
Image by National Institutes of Health Library via Flickr
This is your heart here and this correspondance should be digested urgently and then acted upon immediately. You have stitched me right up!! Get a grip! What in gods name have you done? This pain we’re in, well forgive my bluntness but it is entirely your fault! You TWAT!. I repeat…WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?…Well MIND, I am putting my bloody foot down this time. I’m ordering you to have a word with your mouth, open it, and un-say the words. Do what needs to be done to re-attach me to my left valve. You replaced our original left valve with another one, I went through all that trauma that comes with re-adjusting to an alien body. I readjusted… and now you’ve cut me from the bloody source. I’m working overtime with no chance of a replacement lefty; and I’ve been in alot of pain lately as it is. My ability to regulate us is now seriously compromised. This is dangerous and WE are in agony you masochistic freak! Re boot re boot..over and ooooooooooooooot!
I have recieved your hostile little memo and to be honest, you’re very self absorbed. Read the rest of this entry
Image via Wikipedia
Apparently it takes 7 seconds to fall in love!
What a load of old tripe ;//!
Love takes time doesn’t it?
Friends, Family, Extended Family, Lovers,Wives,Husbands,Boyfriends/Girlfriends … all included…
It takes years to love our true friends,
It takes years to love certain members of our blood family ;), but love them eventually we do,
It takes far longer than 7 seconds to love a new ‘step’ family member, but eventually we sometimes love them too,
The Love Train –
Familiarity comes first, then unique, though sometimes strange bonds/connections are formed; we learn about each other and find areas of intolerance, tolerance, acceptance, and appreciation. Read the rest of this entry
The equation of love a + b + ? = love a = the x factor piece of the interaction from inside ‘person 1’. The ‘thing’ that separates the special yummy naughty fit compatible ones that you don’t think about from one day to the next; from the special yummy naughty fit compatible ones that you are […]